I fucking want to die. No one understands me. No one loves me. They're all bitches. I cry myself to sleep. They all think that my opinion doesn't matter, that I don't matter. Why does everybody agree with everyone except me? I just can't comprehend how this happens to me. They say I love to argue, they say I do this and that, when in reality it's an exaggeration of these things I do for proper reasons! They're the ones who argue, I simply state my opinion which is seen as arguing but what I don't understand is why the fuck when they do it it's all right (it's the same with sarcasm and jokes). It's on such an extreme level it's making me want to go and kill myself. Will there really be light at the end of the tunnel I think to myself. I do a lot of daydreaming about things that make me happy.
Youtube and Minecraft are my escape. I feel a sense of joy emerging from me when I hear Stacy Hinojosa's (StacyPlays) or Lizze's (LDShadowLady) voice. They are doing what they love for a living, earning decent money for playing video games while making high quality video content and commentary. What I really relate to though is like Lizze's and a few other non fake youtubers' draw my life videos because they as a whole had terrible lives and to be as successful as they are now is surprisingly impressive. Music and TV are my secondary escapes where I can just let go and enjoy the ride whether it's dancing or crying to the music or pondering over fanfictions and what will happen in future episodes. This gives me hope for my future, I plan to make a video a week on a Channel called ---------- while having a high paying job that is somewhat similar to a lawyer or an accountant since I'm quite smart. After all, I can only hope, right?
