The Way We Live *Cimorelli Story*

Fallin' Out of Key

KATHERINE...

                      Everythings back to normal or atleast I think so. I mean it's been a tough week. I'm here layed in my bed under my covers with a lamp to direct my sentences. First, yes I know its bad for your eyes, but its more fun to be a rebel! And I just wanted to be in the dark and not in the light where every can see your every move. Well here I am writing this you no one. Sometimes I just feel very lonely and I'm really underestimated. I mean I'm like the downer of the group. Christina's the leader, Lisa's always the favorite of the band, Amy is soooo cute! Lauren, she's just a charmer and Dani, everyone loves how tall she is, but me? I'm ugly, pathetic, and a bad singer. Of course thsi leads all the way to the beginning of our careers or should I say their careers. A joke to me. 

It started in the year 2008 where Christina found out we 'all' liked singing. We brainstormed up for a band name and well I suggested 'Cimorelli' because well it's our last name. Christina concluded that session for the day considering it bad ideas still flowing thru thing. The next day we were back still brainstorming. Christina, (no surprise) came up with an 'new' idea. Cimorelli. I started walking back upstairs without notice. Of course Christina called after me, but I was done. Not being pushed down, not being ordered, mostly. Not being hated. 

You don't know the feeling to this. Or if you do? Do you ever feel like you never get to paticipate. I mean sometimes it's a good thing, but in my case. Its worst than bad. It's worst than worst. It's like you get this feeling of a heart stabb. It might not be a big thing, but what about when it comes to big things? I mean like I remember when we were all in a class in Mom's homeschooling a couple years back. We had a summer reading thing and we had to read it good because we were going to do somethings with in when we get over summer. I was really excited as I remember because I really like the book. I don't remember the book title though. So we went back to the classes of homeschooling. We were to put a plot line in the order of events and well guess what? I got left out. Not that surprising isn't it?

Mom asked me if I were participated enough and of course I didn't want any of them to get in trouble I lied saying they needed me for something else. I could tell mom didn't exactly believed it, but she went on with it. To this day I can't stop thinking about it. Like the time when my neighbor's son came over and we were to sit in a circle. He sat next to me and he smiled at me, but Christina just had to boot inbetween us. I frowned, but didn't let anyone see. I guess I was trying to hard trying please other people that I forgot that I had choices and had my own path. I don't know what I was thinking on how I had my own detour. I laughed at my foolish ways. It's funny how that life can be so unfair. How you can't exactly escape to another universe and make everything OK because there was a place like that I would be long gone from here. 

If only things were differently. Or how I should've realized that I could've changed my ways in the past, but it happened and everything happens for a reason. If only we knew what that reason was. Life is so complicated, but if it was easy I think I wouldn't have liked it as much. 

I closed my journal and sighed. It though helped me release all my pain and anger on how I couldn't release it any other way. I got out of blankets and darkness because I was finished and I couldn't breathe!

I walked downstairs and see no one here. 

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY LISA!" I hear. They celebrate without me. If they can do it now. They can do forever. I silently ran back to my room and packed some of my clothes. I again walked down, but made sure I didn't let them see me. I entered through the kitchen out the door. Maybe it's time to let go. It's been 21 years. I think it's enough. I looked back. Its now or never. I closed the door ever so gently. I walked out into the world of oppurtunites and danger, but I can't go back now I mean I can't go back to something so cruel already. I walked the opposite way of Grandma Matilda's house because I didn't want her to see me. I walked to somewhere I think I'm safe.

The Park.

I sat down at a bench that was empty and I hope to keep it that way. I looked everywhere. It's like they don't even notice I'm gone. That's what hurts. I wrote letters for the Family and Grandma Matilda. Someone just had to sit on the other end of the bench. I took a peek and see it was a lady who was old. Grandma Matilda. I'm not sure if she knows it's me though. I looked back at my shoes. 

"Honey, whatcha doing away from the party?" 

I looked over to her. She wasn't looking at me, but at the kids in the park, but I know she's talking to me.

"Huh?" 

"Why are you here with some luggage?" Now looking at me.

"It's that the party started like 10 minutes earlier than I came down. I wasn't listening to music so they didn't bother to call me." 

"I know baby girl, but is that the real reason that you ran away or was it something more bigger." I sighed.

"Of course it leads to something bigger."

"Can you tell me." She asks me with a warming smile. 

"I don't know how to though." I mean my brain somehow knows what I'm suppose to say, but can't seem to cooperate with my mouth. 

"Tell me when you're ready." She turned back to watching the kids. 

"Just remember. Do it Acapella. You're not Cinderella." 

She then walked away. What? God people's gotta speak more cleary with their minds. 

I still don't know where I'm gonna go. Dang life's hard right now. 

A/N: So you like this chapter? It was Lisa's birthday yesterday! OMG! Anyways, Don't you feel bad for Kath? Remember to VOTE, COMMENT, AND BE AWESOME! p.s. Love the song to the right so much!