OK, so most my life I've been helping people with problems. Family...loss..physical pain..emotional pain. Rejection. Sorrow..loneliness..
It all eventually comes back to one simple term. Let me tell you all my definition of depression. It's not a sickness or a inner feeling...it's an inner demon that eats ur ambitions, and hope away.. Slowly day by day. I'm here to tell you all you are not alone. Even though you feel it, you are a part of numerous like this. And I was one of them and still am sometimes. At a very young age I grew up knowing my father beat my mom over her every mistake. He was a drug addict and was a thief, he always let his anger get the better of him. He let my mother get arrested because of him "she's out now" because she was a first time offender.. She was arrested after that shortly for a second time and was in prison..5 years of my life. That was when I was 9...
My father a few months later was caught and arrested for three years. And tbh...he was arrested again 3 months ago...I watched him shoot up, smoke dope and sell those drugs... One night I even had to guard someone else's house til 4 a.m with a 12 guage cause they were afraid they were being stalked. I lived with my Nana from very young because she rescued me from that drug house before the police could get me. I was lucky in the least for that much. I feel guilty for the loss of my dad back to prison again. And I don't know exactly why... I should tried harder. But let me tell you this people. Everyday is a new battle. Something new to fight for. To be alive and prove that life itself hasn't won yet. And it won't win til your heart beats itself to death! I want everyone whose ever experienced sever depression to comment or vote. And I'll message u to talk and give my telegram. I'd love to talk to you all. And those who've self harmed because you've felt soo low.
I'm right there with you. I slipped last night actually but I'm going for clean again... And I'm not losing again. Ik that most do it to show they can still feel, they see their blood and feel "I'm still breathing and I CAN feel...but I'm barely here to know it for sure" I'm sorry for every one of you. I just wanted to start this book to give all of those out there that are undermined the appreciation they deserve. Self harm is never the answer. Some do it hoping it'll be their last breath, not knowing if anyone really cared or..if anyone ever really will. No one gets them.. But that's because they're unique.. Better...amazing. All I'm their own ways. Emotional pain..sadness. And depression all in itself is an opponent most in life will and shouldn't have to face. But I want every one who's felt it or is feeling it, to know you're not alone and to hang in there. I may not know you but I'd like to. And I'm sure you are all amazing... Ever single one of you. No matter what so called flaws u have, were all flawed. It's what makes us us. Love all of my readers and fans, I hope your lives are good.. And I pray that they get better if not.. Hugs and kisses to you all.:)
From your loving writer
Donavon Watson
Don the fox
