Diana (a Harry Styles Fanfiction)

Nobody cares what I think, nobody cares what I feel, nobody cares if I die so why am I here? I type on my phone repeatedly as my attempt to make sense of my feelings. this is what I do when I'm confused, I go in my notes on my phone and write my feelings.


'Dear, mom and dad, those multiple cuts on my skin weren't just because of your evil ways they were because I'm hurt I am bullied every single day. I was in so much pain I took a shower, grabbed my raiser, tore the blade off and dug deeply into my skin. Those bracelets weren't just for looks they were to cover up my pain. Dad you cause me so much pain, I just want you to know that if I die from hurt, pain, self harm that you are a big part of the reason. So when I die and the police search through my phone you all will see this message. Mom you didn't defend me, you didn't defend me when my dad was abusing me. I would just stand there and soak in all the pain and when he was done I would run in the bathroom and cut. I would cut because of you two. Mom, just because you want your fucking marriage to work doesn't me I have to suffer. I know that you just don't want to be alone, there are way better men out there. As for you dad you will NEVER change. Right now you are a evil man who cant control his anger. I'm lost. I'm blind, I can't see through this hurt but I wish I could. I'm broken. I need healing, but I cant heal my emotions aren't letting me. Because of you two and bullying I have so many thoughts of suicide I just want to kill myself. Do you know how hard it is to be abused by your own dad and then just go to school the next day and get crap there too!! I try to act happy and put on a fake smile and some times it actually works, but not always. I'm never going to tell you guys this so I hope one day you'll find out, if not I don't know how long I'll be able to stand on my own. I wish you guys would just listen to me and I wish you could tell that I'm hurting.


When I'm done writing I'm quite exhausted. All this opening up is making me tired. I try to go to sleep, but I can't, not yet. I go and pick up my dog Chloe." You're going to sleep with me tonight, ok?" she wags her tail in response. great. now I've really lost it. I'm talking to my dog. I put her on my bed and set my alarm for tomorrow. I get under the covers and get comfy while Chloe is under my arm. I lay there just thinking. will things every change? Will I ever have peace? Will I be alive when I'm 18? before I come to a solution my eyelids droop and I fall asleep.
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I woke up the next morning to find Chloe sniffing the ground. " Time to go outside!" I say causing her to run to my bedroom door and bark."Shhh!!!" I said in attempt to get her to stop barking. I open my bedroom door and she runs to the front door. I grab her lease and head out.

While I'm taking Chloe out for a walk I notice the new neighbors nextdoor "Hmmm. I wonder who that is?'' Chloe stops and pees on the ground. I start to head back to the house since she's done. My mom is at work but my dad stayed home from work so I'm just alone with my dad.great. note the sarcasm. I open the front door and picked up Chloe's food bowl while I filled it up with dog food. I set her bowl down and watch her munch away.

I open the cabinet and pull out a cereal box and a bowl I go to the refrigerator and get the milk out I poured cereal and milk into my bowl watching it as the little corn flakes sink to the bottom. I hurry and eat my cereal so I can go to my bedroom and get ready for the day.

I put my bowl in them sink and head up stairs. I grab a towel and head for the shower. I sit in the shower and let the water beads fall on my head. I quickly wash myself with my vanilla body wash and step out of the shower and quickly wrap a towel around my body before the cold crisp air can get to me.

I hurry to my bedroom and got dressed. I put on a navy blue poka dot blouse with black skinny jeans and nude flats. I brush my dark brown hair in to a high pony tail and put a black bow where the hair tie is. I grabbed my phone and put it in my back pocket while I heading out the back door the my tree house. I know you're thinking why I have a tree house, but this is my escape so don't judge.

 I climb into the tree house and grab my guitar and start to strum the beat of 'fall' by Ed Sheeran. I start to sing.

"You an I two of a mind this love's one of a kind

You and I we're drifting over the edge

And I will fall for you, and I will fall for you if I fall for you would you fall too?

You and I learning how  to speak with kisses on the cheeks

You and I we're lifted over the edge

and I will fall for you, and I will fall for you and if I fall for you would you fall too?"

I finished the last lines and wiped my tears as I just sat there singing different songs.

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A/N sooo should I continue?? is it good so far? tell me what you think in the comments please!

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