My Light In The Dark

Hello....

[~•~Amu's view~•~]

It was dark while I was sitting in the park. I was sitting on the swing, slowly swaying back and forth. From afar I could hear the church's bell. It was 12 o'clock. Midnight to be exact.

It didn't seem to bother anyone what a small 18 years old girl is doing alone and unprotected in a park in the middle of the night. Well, that's the crule world we live in.

The cigarette between my lips burned out as i took the last breath. Damn, I thought. I just wanted to smoke to the market point since that was were all the crap was in.

Okay,I was smoking. So nothing about it was good. But I wanted to safe at least a few years of my life. I threw the filter on the floor and pressed it with my foot out. The wind was messing up my wavy pink hair. I cuddled my coat closer to my body.

It was getting cold again. Maybe it was a stupid reason to smoke. But it kept me warm. The problem was, that just now was my last one.

I slipped my hands in the pockets of my short balck coat and rummaged around for a while. I usually had a bit of money with me. I just hoped it was enough to buy me a new pack.

I went in the 24-hours store across the street. It was useful to have such a shop around. Especially for a stray like me. Well, I wasn't a stray. I had a home I could go to. I just didn't like it.

I looked around trough what I could choose. I didn't really care about the brand. I smoked like literally everything. From Marlboro to Camel, from L&M to Kool. I was thinking about taking Kool. I haven't has any menthol cigarettes in a while. But I'd be outside a lot and needed some that would last long. I took lucky strickes. They last quiet some time. More than other cigarettes.

I paid for them before going back outside. I sat down on the swing again. While swaying back and forth I lit a cigarette with my lighter. It wouldn't have mattered if I had been home 2 hours ago or if I will be home in two hours. Like this or like that it'll end the same. So I stayed. Here in the park....where I could feel free.

I looked up at the sky. When I was young my father showed me a lot of star signs. I still knew a lot of them because I loved whatching the stars.

"Hey there" greeted me a familiar voice. I straightened my head, looking at a handsome face, framed with dark blue hair.

He sat down on the swing next to me, trying to start a conversation. His name was Ikuto. He told me that the very first day we meet. For a week he already came here around this time. I went here since I could think so I didn't think about going anywhere.

He was kinda molesting me. He didn't touch me or anything like that. But he talked....a lot.

I never responded to him. I wasn't very good at having conversations. But even if he thought I didn't listen I did. He was new in town and just moved here with his family. He didn't knew a lot of people and had jetlag. That explained why he was in a park in the middle of the night. Not really, but it explained why he was awake.

"Aren't you a bit young to smoke?" He asked me directly. That is the first time he asked me something now. Usually he just told me things. Which is pretty dumb, I think. I mean....I could be a serial killer who's searching for informations.

"I'm 18" I answered a bit pissed as I faced him.

"What? I thought you'd be like 15!" He responded shocked "but thanks for finally saying sometbing....I was thinking about dozens of ways to make you talk to me already" he chuckled.

I looked a him surprised as my face reddened. I avoided his gaze again. I started feeling a bit uncomfortable. Not uncomfortable, but strange. I never really talked with someone like that.

"You know....you could at least greet me. I'm coming here for already a week. Thats longer than most of my relationships" said the blue haired boy.

".....Hello...." I muttered quietly before throwing the burned out cigarette on the ground again, just the like the other one.

"See. That wasn't so hard, right?" He asked amused "next you could tell, me your name. I can't always just say cutie if I think of you" he suggested.

"My...my name is Amu" I responded as I reddened slightly. Is he actually flirting with me right now?

"Your name is almost as cute as you are yourself" he said with a slight grin. The heat in my face rose even more. He was really kind, even if he appeared like a player.

"My name is Ikuto" he said.

"I know....I'm listening when you talk to me" I explained. He looked surprised before smiling. It took me a moment but I smiled back. It was the first time someone approached me this kindly.

The bells had rung. It was one in the morning. I stood up and was about to start my way back home. Suddenly I heard my name being called. I turned around, seeing Ikuto stand there following me.

"If I annoy you you don't need to go. You were here before, I go" he explained a bit disappointed.

"No....I need to go home. I have school tomorrow" I explained a bit amused. I guess he really flirted earlier.

"So I guess I see you here tomorrow then?" He asked. I didn't response and just nodded my head.

"See you tomorrow, Ikuto" I said as I started my way again.

"See you tomorrow, Amu" I could hear him say from afar. A smile was plastered across my face. He was nice. I haven't talked to someone this nice in so long.

I arrived at mg house. The lights were still on. I climbed over the fence into the garden. Then I climbed onto a tree before sneaking trough a window into my room.

I tiptoed to my bed, trying to not make any sound. If I did....it would be no good for me. Accidently I hit the desk and a few books dropped to the ground.

Oh no..., I thought as chills went I'll my skin. I could hear loud ,big footsteps come upstairs before someone smacked my door. I jumped up scared before sitting down on my bed.

"Amu!" Yelled a loud male voice "you useless piece of trash! Where have you been! Open the damn door!" He yelled.

I crouched together and leaned at the wall while sitting on my bed. Faithfully the door was locked. It was my foster father. His voice became louder and louder as he hit the door harder and harder.

I was afraid the door could break. But it wouldn't. He would get tired. He always did. Then he would go and I could go to sleep. But he'd be even angrier next time...and it will hurt even more.

I tightly held my stomach. Even the thought of it made be feel cramps already. My wounds had no time to heal and I was marked with new ones. Thats was my life. The life of Hinamori Amu.

And I fear it never changes.

My parents died in an accident about 10 years ago. I was raised by a foster family. At first they were nice. But since I turned 12 everything went down.

My foster father had lost his job a while ago and started drinking. He barely can keep a job. He drowns all his sorrow in alcohol. My foster mother didn't even have a job. She the cliché of a houswoman. A lazy one as well. She was just at home, spending money and cheating on her husband.

Both are full of hate and anger. And both use me as a punch bag to let that anger out. Me, the thing they need to keep alive. Why don't they just throw me out? Is a good question. But then their life would be even more miserable. They wouldn't get child support otherwise.

They don't care about what I do. But if what I do is against their liking k get punished. I get to feel all their hate. No matter how much it harms me. I learned to life with it.

My life is horrible. The only thing I live for is because I think I can do better. It's my last year of high school. Just this much time to bear. I don't have anything worth to life.

I can only enjoy the times I feel free. When I know I can do what I want without getting hit. Like today. Maybe I even have found a reason to keep fighting for.

He was kind. Maybe he can give me some sense to not end this. Ikuto....maybe he is my light in this dark world.