Scars.

Prologue

My name is Hadley Elizabeth Sanders. I guess I'll start from the beginning, I was born on a cold November night eighteen years ago, November 7th to be exact. My parents weren't rich and they weren't the best parents but one thing I know was that they were deeply in love. I was their second child, their first was my brother Alex who is only a year older than me. They were never married I guess because they couldn't afford it.

We lived in California, where I was born until I was seven. Then we moved to Virginia when my parents found out they were having another child, Matthew. My father thought it would be cheeper down south so down south we went. Two years later she was expecting yet another child. Which meant I was finally going to have a sister, Olivia. And about two years after she was born, I bet your excepting me to say my mother had another baby, aren't you? Well she did, Jason who is the youngest. 

But when I was eleven things started to change. My parents weren't the lovey dovey happy couple any more but the complete opposite. More kids caused more problems. Both their jobs combined didn't raise enough money to feed seven mouths and pay the bills. So my parents started arguing about money along with other stuff more and more. I knew they both tried really hard to stay together for the sake of our family but they were miserable. They always threatened to leave each other.  

And one day my mother just didn't came home and we haven't seen her since. My guess is that she went to live with my grandparents or found a really hot rich guy and left us for him.

After my mom left everything started to fall apart. My dad went into a long depression, depression sorta runs in the family.  When I was fourteen my father got a huge job opportunity in England. And that's when we moved here, to Bradford.  

Ever since we've been here my dad has worked non stop. Which means we barely ever she him and I miss him. I miss my brother, too. Even though he's a year older than me and we go to the same school, we don't talk much. He is in the popular clique and I'm not. He is a prick and a jerk who treats girls like they're garbage. And he's not too smart considering he's still a senor, like me. He doesn't tell anyone we are related. When we pass each other in the halls he looks the other way. I've been starting to think he is ashamed of me. I would be too if I were him.  

He wasn't always like that though, he changed when we moved here. Or maybe it was after mom left, I don't know.

I feel like everythings her fault, you know? She left us, without even saying goodbye.

Cara is the nanny who has been like a mother to us for the last few years. She is the one who does all of the household chores and takes care of us, well mostly the younger ones. Alex refuses to do anything she tells him but I do because of the respect I have for her. I mean what women would put her life aside to take care of five kids? Sure, she gets paid but she never gets any breaks. She has to even lives with us. The poor women. 

Now onto my appearance, I have light brown hair that hangs down to my mid back and boring brown eyes. My face is just simply my face, two eyes, a nose and a mouth nothing special. I have never considered myself pretty or attractive in anyway and neither has anyone else. Never.  

I'm not overweight according to the doctors but I'm not as skinny as most girls. I can't lie and say I'm confident with myself because Im quite shy and insecure. 

I have no friends, not one. I'm invisible like a ghost, I could be died and no one would notice. I bet they wouldn't even care if they did notice. If you've ever been ignored or felt invisible, you know it's make you feel useless. That's how I feel about myself everyday.  

Sometimes I think there's no reason for me to live on this planet. There's no reason to live and be unhappy when you could just end it all. End the pain, end the sorrow and end the growing anger. I think about this topic a lot and nobody knows it. It's just like nobody knows about me slitting my wrist. 

Yes, I cut but only sometimes. It's not that I wanna hurt myself but it helps take away some of the pain. I know it probably doesn't make much sense but I don't even understand it either. And the thing is no one would understand and they would look at me like Im some type of wild animal so I keep it a secret. It's my little secret.  

I don't really know what I'm going to with my life, yet. Maybe I'll just jump of the top of my building, just kidding. 

But I really wanna turn into something successful. I wanna grow old and tell my kids I was strong enough to survive. I wanna be happy. I wanna have adventures. I wanna to fall in love one day. Mostly I just wanna happy ending, like Cinderella.