When I first started things i can't forget
, I was sure it was going to be my least favorite of Miranda Kenneally’s Hundred Oaks series. The main character, Kate, immediately annoyed me with her judgmental attitude and her holier than thou pronouncements about her best friend Emily’s unexpected pregnancy and subsequent abortion. It wasn’t just principled discussion, it bordered on callous shaming. I was worried I wouldn’t be able to keep reading the book because my eyes were rolling too much to stay trained on the words. I’m SO glad I kept going, because I went from almost hating Kate to growing to feel for her deeply and respect her, and somewhere along the way, things i can't forget became my favorite Miranda Kenneally book by far.
So, no, Kate and I did not get off to a very good start. I wanted to shake her actually, multiple times. Kate belongs to a very conservative Christian church, and she’s lived her life completely according to its extreme strictures; she was even known as a “Jesus Freak” growing up. I have nothing against religion and think its wonderful when people turn to their church for community and guidance, but Kate’s church is the sort that ostracizes its members in their time of crisis and shames them cruelly (if you’ve read Stealing Parker, it’s the same church that treated Parker like a leper when her mother came out). So Kate is in the habit of being quite open with her judgment—probably why she feels comfortable hounding her friend about her abortion and how she should ask God for forgiveness (despite the fact that Emily isn’t sure she’s religious anymore). When Kate starts her summer job as a camp counselor, she and Emily aren’t even speaking to each other.
At camp, Kate encounters many more people and scenarios that offend her strict sensibilities—counselors having sex before marriage! a group of guys and girls sleeping in the same room! a counselor who breaks camps rules and lies about it! As I watched more of Kate’s reactions to a world that flies in the face of her religion, I began to slowly understand where she was coming from, and empathize with her desire to fit in, make friends, and be liked and loved, all while staying true to her beliefs. It is a struggle everyone has to face—reconciling your own beliefs and morals with a world wholly uninterested in conforming to them. Should you just endure quietly or try to change other people? How do you stay true to yourself if it makes you an outsider in every way?
Once again, Miranda Kenneally brings the swoon in a major way. Matt was Kate’s first kiss at camp years before when they were kids, and the guy who used to be gawky and shy has grown into quite the stunner. Kate’s new assessment of Matt: ”he’s a literature major with a mess of dirty blond hair who could be a bicep model.” Matt’s not just a hottie, he’s also incredibly sweet, a talented musician, and a good friend. But he belongs to a frat, is ok with girls and guys sleeping in the same room, and is definitely ok with doing more than a good Christian girl should with Kate. As her relationship with Matt gets deeper, her struggle with her faith and her iron clad principles gets more intense.
If the transformation that comes over Kate during this summer was only the product of her hormones and her relationship with Matt, I might call it hypocritical (she’s willing to bend the strict rules when she is tempted by a hot guy). But there are a whole range of experiences and relationships beyond her physical relationship with Matt that cause her to open her eyes and see other people (and herself) for the imperfect creatures they are. Kate learns to become a more accepting person, all while retaining a strong sense of her beliefs.
Aside from the romance, Kate’s friendship with Parker was one of the reasons this book worked so well for me. Parker feels pretty much the same way I did about Kate in the beginning. Kate is part of the church that made her life hell, after all, and Kate never once reached out to her when Parker was going through the worst time in her life. As they spend time together, Kate sees beyond her easily passed judgment and realizes she actually likes Parker; that Parker is not the sum of her (and her family’s) mistakes. Their new friendship helps Kate realize how her own prejudices and beliefs caused her to fall short in her friendship with Emily as well. I still don’t know if I myself would befriend Kate, even by the end of the book, but I feel I understand her better, and I respect her journey.
Here’s how I know Miranda Kenneally is on my must buy list forever—she made me warm up to an uptight, judgmental prude and a frat boy (albeit a nice one), and made me hang on their every move. Normally for me to be invested in a book, I have to relate to the characters on some level. If I had read a surface description of the plot of things i can't forget, I probably would have bolted. But reading the same plot through the lens of Miranda’s writing, I was sucked in completely. Miranda Kenneally is right up there with Sarah Dessen for me, and I can’t wait to read the next book, Racing Savannah (though it certainly has big shoes to fill).
