The Bad Boy & The Rebel

Lesson 1: The Moral of the Story is to Behave

Okay listen here you scumbags watching this live video. I know you guys were waiting for me to strip, jackoff with myself, or have hot sex with a guy. Guess what's happening hun: nada, ziltch, no wammy here. There's always two part of a story, it's time to tell mine.

After this experience, I learned a lot of thing. I learned lessons that I will apply in life. Lesson that I'll share with the people who haven't logged off yet.

Judge me after I tell you story. I don't care. At least judge me by the truth than the BS happening. Got it?

So this is my story. My side of the story. This is my so called beautiful life:

Lesson 1: The Moral of the Story is to Behave

Was I a sane person? Do I think like others do? Was I stupid? Well according to sociologists, my decisions were influenced based on society. That's total BS if you ask me. Does waiting for your dad to pick you up from jail count as society influencing me? I guess not. No. I made that choice. So society can suck a pop and leave me alone.

So seating behind bars with Derek apparently seemed all fine with me. Of course the thin mattress wasn't doing my back any good but I would rather take this than one of my father's infamous speeches about the way I am acting out.

"We could've just been good little boys and girls and we wouldn't be stuck in this place," Derek casually said from the bottom bunk.

"You were so asking for it," I defended. Yeah sure, we were so totally going to paint each others nail, knit matching sweaters, and watch "Mean Girls."

"But who suggested it, Ketchum?" He challenged, feeling the smirk in his lips as he said it. So I'm guessing that you don't understand the reference. Ash Ketchum. Does Pokemon sound familiar?

Honestly, he was lucky that I felt generous to not give him a knuckle sandwich- he was really asking for it though.

"I'm sorry, Brock, for trying to lighten up your night besides you having the munchies," I snapped, looking under my bunk and seeing Derek casually laid down on the bed.

I could see that he tried to hold back a laugh but we ended up laughing. Things were always like that with Derek and I. We could never get mad at each other.

Suddenly, Sheriff Hill unlocked the door. He was tall round man with his black uniform on and always munching on a donut. I honestly thought he was stupid, turns out that he's a smart cookie:

It all started with Derek and I wanting to do something fun. It was Sunday and tomorrow was the first day of Senior Year. We wanted to kick off the year with bang and not a meow. Yolo, right? No. No. Stupidest choice ever if you ask me.

I, being the Einstein that I am, made the wise suggestion to go vandalize a building. Genius, right?

My first mistake.

Derek and I were having fun beautifying an ugly building until we heard and saw the sirens. Off we went into the night, Batman and Robin off the scene and into Gothic City.

My second mistake.

Somehow, I don't know why, we ran into an alley. Derek being the monkey that he was got on the a dumpster and hoisted me up. Me being the normal person thought that we were going to jump the brick wall blocking us from the land of the free (an open field with a bunch of trees and a bunch of places to hide). No, in Derek's crazy agenda he had written that we jumped into the dumpster. Who in their right mind does that?

Oh, yeah, Derek.

I'm pretty sure my third mistake could be identified.

So sure, being inside a closed-lid dumpster was the best place in the world you know with all that fragrance of flowers, heavenly food, and potentially recyclable items. No. No. No. It smelled like garbage. It smelled like one of Derek's farts when he decided to let one rip after eating way too much beans.