Clandestine: A Story of Three Sisters

Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen- Accusations

And so Madison and Jed continued their affair into the following week. It had become routine, almost clockwork. Madison would go into the office around the same time, they would kiss for a little, Jed would turn her around, they would fornicate, and Madison would leave. Then they'd have to have dinner with Charlotte only hours later, acting like nothing was happening. And Charlotte only seemed to be getting more loathsome toward Jed.

Madison noticed all this and felt like a bad child. Like Charlotte was her mother, and she knew Madison had been sneaking cookies from the cookie jar, but she was waiting for Madison to confess to it. Mealtimes where all three members of the house were present were unbearable, and Madison had to work very hard to keep herself from looking guilty.

For you see, just like a child who sneaks cookies, she didn't want to give her sneaking up. Maybe Charlotte knew, maybe she didn't, but either way Madison didn't want to confess to anything. She knew if she did, it would end her affair with Jed, and that was the last thing she wanted.

Losing Abigail was like losing a limb for Madison. She was constantly racked with thoughts of why it happened, why one of their farm-hands would've killed Abby, who was loved by all. Will had been a nice, charming worker ever since she could remember, so none of it made sense to her. But being with Jed made her forget it all. His arms around her, protecting her, his lips on hers, comforting her. It was so warm and addictive. It felt like home.

Madison knew these thoughts were dangerous. She knew it wasn't right to fall in love with her brother-in-law; but falling in love is so easy for a vulnerable girl who has gone through so much grief, and now needs to feel loved. She just didn't know if Jed felt the same, or if she was just a "biological need" for him. She needed to find out, because his answer could change everything.

So when she visited him next, they went about their usual routine of starting out by kissing, but in between kisses Madison spoke. "Jed, why do you always take me from behind?"

His kissing became slower as he thought about what she was asking. He knew the answer, but he also knew he couldn't tell it to her. His mind began to race, trying to come up with a logical answer for her, but Madison spoke again.

"I just mean that our... meetings... have become so much more than physical to me, and I just want to know," they weren't kissing anymore, and she could now look into his eyes. "If it's the same for you?"

Jed saw it: that spark in her eyes, that yearning. It was love, and he wanted to curse himself. Of course she fell in love with him, what did he expect? She was vulnerable, he was there for her, it was all so obvious and now he was trapped. If he said she didn't mean anything to him but a way of remembering Abby, she'd never even speak to him again. But if he agreed, he'd be lying but she would continue to be with him. It was selfish and cruel, but he needed Madison. When he closed his eyes, he felt as if he were with Abby again, and if he lost that feeling again it would ruin him.

"It's just habit, I suppose." He answered her question slowly. "I never meant for this to be only physical."

"So," Madison's eyes were downcast and her cheeks were blushing. "Our equation is more than physical? You feel things for me?"

Jed swallowed, unable to speak anymore lies, but nodded his head. Madison's cheeks flushed even more as she leaned into him, hugging him. Jed hugged her back, feeling a little sick to his stomach. But once he sniffed her earthy smell, so much like Abby's, he forgot his disgust. He pulled her head back and kissed her lips again, still slow.

Jed undid his trousers, and it took everything he had in him to not turn her over. Instead, he sunk into his chair, pulling Madison with him. She lifted her skirts up and straddled him on the chair, wrapping her arms around his neck. She began to roll her body over him, her face twisting into a look of desire. Jed couldn't look at her face without feeling like something was wrong, so he closed his eyes and just let her feel all the love she needed.