Locum Tenens

Prologue

I've spent my night reading a book my mom gave me. I've been reading for a little while now, but I'm tired so I put it down and turn off the lamp besides my bed. I lay down and try to drift to sleep. I can hear crickets and the occasional car drive by. I'm almost there; almost asleep.
[bang]
A loud noise jolts me awake. The clock reads 11:32. I know from watching movies that it was a gunshot. It's cool in movies but right now I'm scared. I go to hide in my closet. The lights are all off so I can't see. I'm just sitting in the back of my closet in pitch black, terrified. What happened? Why did it sound so close? It's not too long till mom comes in and tells me not to be scared. She also tells me not to leave my room, so I'm still scared. She leaves as quickly as she came, and shuts the door behind her. She never turned the light on. She didn't tell me what happened so I just go and plop on my bed, hugging Mister Guy, my favorite teddy bear. He keeps me calm when I have nightmares, and apparently also when I hear gunshots at night. But I'm not that calm right now so I guess not.
I'm sitting on my bed, and I feel like I'm going to throw up. I feel like I need to hug something, but I can't possibly hold Mister Guy any tighter. I curl up into him, and start to cry. I don't even know why I'm crying. I'm just confused and scared and now I'm crying. I hear sirens in the distance. As I realize they're getting closer I guess that they're coming here. What's the emergency? An ambulance pulled up in front of our little house and I look out the window to see them pulling out a bed thing. I got my plastic periscope and put one end at the bottom of the door, and put my eye to the other end so I could see what was going on. I see a man and a woman in uniforms hurry into Mac's room, and carry him out. I also see some of his blood hit the floor. I'm so scared. I love my brother and I don't want anything to happen to him ever. He's really nice and he shares his fruit snacks, why would anyone want to hurt him? I jump to the window as fast as I can. I watch the people in uniforms come outside and put my brother on the bed, and put that in the ambulance. Then they drive away. I hope that they are taking him to a hospital because that's where hurt people go to get better. I don't want Mac to be hurt. I don't want Mac to be in a hospital. I want him to be home and be okay and to tell me everything's going to be all right. I know that's not going to happen right now so I go back to my bed, crying much harder now. I'm sitting here and burying my head in my pillow. I guess I should just stay here and wait for mom.
She finally comes in and turns on the light. I can tell she was crying but she's trying to hide it. She never liked to cry in front of me or Mac. She looks exhausted. Her blonde hair is all messy and her Brown eyes are surrounded in red. She sits down on my bed in her blue bathrobe. I hold Mister Guy tighter. "Mommy", I ask, "what happened to Mac?" She stares at me for a moment before registering that I asked a question. She clears her throat, and said he had an accident, but he would be okay. I want to ask her more, but something tells me this is all I'm getting right now. She hugs me really tight, and says to get some sleep because we are going to visit him tomorrow morning and that I can skip school. I tell her I will, even though I know I won't. I don't know if she actually expects me to sleep tonight. I just watched my older brother be taken away by an ambulance. Isn't sleep the last thing you should do when something like that happens? She touches my shoulder and gives a reassuring smile, but I can tell she's really nervous or sad. She gets up and leaves my room, turning off the light on her way out. I space out and stare at the fish painting on my wall beside my door, half illuminated by the moonlight. It's been maybe a half an hour now, so I climb back under my blankets, still clutching my bear.
I'm looking up at the ceiling. All I can see is black. A car drives by and for a moment their headlights brighten my room. But then they're gone and my room is once again black. What happened to Mac? Did he get shot? By who? Why? All I can think of is the endless questions. Is Mac going to be okay? Is he dead now? I notice that I'm crying again, and wipe my tears away. My face is itchy from crying and I'm really tired from it. Crying takes a lot of energy.