fifty-six days

day five

on the fifth day, i saw him in the supermarket. and that's when he told me something that I didn't understand.

I needed coffee. and strawberries. and vanilla ice cream.

going out, for me, was one of the most nerve racking things I could do. the thought of being away from my flat and being surrounded by strangers worried me, but I had waited so long that my cravings were stronger than my urge to stay at home and hide from the world.

the walk to the supermarket was no longer than fifteen minutes, and twant he small car park was inhabited by only several cars.

about five minutes later my basket was still half empty. all it contained was a tub of vanilla ice cream, a bag of salt and vinegar crisps and a litre carton of orange juice. the basket mostly lacking the objects i desired.

I headed towards the colder isles, in need of some milk, and that was when I was knocked to the ground, my shopping basket following suit.

"I'm so sorry I didn't mean to bump into you. here, let me help"

the deep voice sounded familiar, and I took hold of the large hand to pull myself up.

"I know you told me to leave you alone but I don't think I can do that"

it was him.

"why can't you? why can't you just leave me alone."

the look on his face made it obvious that he wasn't expecting me to react like that.

"i-i don't know why, there's just something about you that makes me want to stay."

what does he mean? what the hell is he saying.

"i don't understand."

he shook his head and sighed

"neither do I. I just know that I want to talk to you, I want to see you without you running away. why do you always run away?"

I don't know, luke , I don't know.

and then I ran away.