I Need You

Lean on me

Hello readers! Thanks for reading this it really does mean a lot to me! J

I’m sorry for the slow updates, but I do have school and I have homework so ill try but this will probably be updated slowly im sorry

Well here ya go!!!

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~Louis POV~

I stared at the scene in front of me shockingly. My mouth hung open and my eyes wide. I can’t believe Harry found my stash. Why was he snooping around in my room anyways? I was not prepared for this. I can’t deal with this. This is too much for me. What do I do? Can I really play this off? I’ll have to try.

I swallowed, trying to collect myself. “What’s wrong Harry?” I said nervously. There is no way this is going to work. He knows me. He looked at me, suddenly stopped crying and looked a bit angry.

            “What’s wrong? I think you know very well what’s wrong Louis” Harry stated sternly. I am not ready for this. There is no way that this is actually happening right now. I never wanted anyone to find out. I would really like to use one of those razors right now.

            “Um no everything is f-f-fine” I stumbled out. I was so nervous that I was shaking. I’m not used to this. I need my razors to calm me down. I don’t like feeling like this.

            “No Louis, no more excuses. I want some answers. Do you think you can do that?” Harry asked. I wanted to say no and run away, but I know I couldn’t. I don’t want to answer anything.

            “Umm I g-g-gue-ess” I stuttered. I felt like crying myself. Why can’t I just be left alone. I like it better when im alone. No one has to know about the pain or the tears. Just me, myself, and I.

            “Why do you have a box full of razors underneath your sink with blood on them?” He asked, tears spilling out again. Why do I have to answer this? We both know the answer.

            “Um I um it’s not um-“I started. “No Louis don’t give me some bullshit answer I want to know the truth. Do you cut yourself?” Harry interrupted. I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I burst into tears and my knees fell to the floor. Harry rushed to my side and hugged me. The tears kept flowing down my face. Harry just held me and let me cry, exactly what I needed.

            “Oh Louis, why didn’t you tell me? Why did you have to hurt yourself?” Harry asked. His voice sounded heartbroken. That only made me sob more. He sounded so disappointed in me. “Here why don’t I bring you to the bed so we aren’t on this uncomfortable floor.” Harry suggested. I nodded my head and he picked me up. He walked me over and sat me on the bed. I curled into him with the tears still falling. He just cuddled me into his chest and rubbed my back. This calmed me a bit and the tears started to slow down. After about 5 minutes I had no more tears to shed.

            “Now can we talk?” Harry asked. Deep breathe Louis. You can do this. You don’t need to tell him everything.

            “Yeah okay” I replied. This was it. Two secrets in one day. This was a new record, beating the old record of 0.

            “Why didn’t you tell me about this?” Harry asked again. It’s not only him, I didn’t tell anybody. But, I guess im glad that he was the one to find out and not any of the other boys.

            “I don’t want you to look at me the way I look at myself.” I said truthfully. That was my biggest fear.

            “Well how do you look at yourself?” Harry asked. There were so many words floating through my head, I was trying to pick out the right ones.