What We Should've Been

Prologue

  And just like that it hit me. Happiness doesn't last forever, even though I thought mine would. Life isn't suppose to be about heartbreak and sadness. It is about achieving your dreams, falling in love, and growing old with the one that brings you light when the only thing you see is darkness. But now that's all I see. Without you, there is nothing left of me. If anyone could tell me how I'm suppose to understand why this is happening, please someone tell me now. I fell asleep every night with her by my side, never did I think I would be losing sleep without her near me. She's gone now. I need to accept the truth, but I just can't. I know what happened. I don't need to hear the facts. I am in pain. I'm not delusional.

  I know it has been months since she's been gone, but don't you dare tell me everything will be okay when everything I know is wrong. She wasn't suppose to leave. We were suppose to last forever. What is the point of me staying here when my future was suppose to be with her? I don't see a reason for me anymore. Why would you want to stay in a place where you are drowning  and no one can save you. I'm killing myself with the pain. I know that isn't what she would of wanted. She would want me to be happy, to go on with life. She would want me to continue like everything is fine. But I am not everything.

  What about me? How am I suppose to be fine? We were suppose to buy our first house, have kids, and build that stupid snowman that you wanted to make. We were suppose to take a trip to Paris, because that is where you have always wanted to go. We were going to go to family dinners, and I was going to spend my whole life trying to keep you happy. These were all the things that should of happened. These were all the things we should've been.