Too Far Gone

"Juliet!"

"Jule." I corrected my best friend Emily, who narrowed her eyes at me and then sighed.

"How you feeling today, love?" she asked in her soft British accent.

"I'm fine." I said calmly. Composed. Fake. I walked along the halls, my golden hair whipping behind me as Emily struggled to keep up.

"Jules, stop walking so fast... I'm much shorter than you. So are my legs." she laughed. And she was. She was tiny at 5'0 while i towered over her at 5'7. I smiled at her and slowed my pace.

"Have you talked to Rom-" she began to say as i stuffed my earbuds into my ears. Plain White T's exploded into my ears.

"I told you Em, we do not talk about him." I hissed at her.

"Jule. He couldn't say no to what his dad-"

"I'm NOT TALKING ABOUT HIM!" I shouted at her, striding angrily into the classroom.

At least he wasn't at this school. He had always gone to another. I shook thoughts of him from my mind and dove into the math worksheet that was given to us.

My phone buzzed sharply in my pocket. I picked it up and checked under the desk. I stared at an all- to- farmiliar number I could remeber even if I had deleted the contact.

'Juliet, can we please, please talk?'

I ignored the text and went to work.

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I walked out of the school into the bustling courtyard and made my way back to my house.

"Hey sweetie!"  my mom called from the kitchen. "I have cookies!"

I rolled my eyes and walked in the kitchen to see my mom. The smiled at me, her ocean blue eyes that matched mine crinkling as she smiled. "No thanks mom, I have to go do-"

"You are far too willowy, my dear, and I suggest you get some cookies so you are plump like me." That was the only difference between me and my mom. I had my father's tall, willowy frame, but my mothers blue eyes and curly blonde locks.

Oh, and she was in love with my father. I was alone.

I grabbed a cookie and walked upstairs grumpily.

Why was it always someone you couldn't breathe without left you?

My mother followed me up to my room. "Jule... you can't do this. You have to push past and move on. You'll find your Rom-"

"His name was Romeo, mom." I whispered. "There will never be anyone else. Ever."

She stared at me for a minute before heading downstairs. I let out a shaky breath and then burst into sobs.

My body shook. Why me? Why not someone who didn't actually love them? I loved him, I loved him, I loved Romeo and there was nothing I could say or he could say or do to give up love. I don't think he loved me.. but I could love him, couldn't I? There was no stopping the burning inside my heart that was slowly eating me up- one day I would burn up.

And I couldn't stop it.

 I had my armour. My shiny, strong armour. It could protect me. But not from myself.

"I knew it." Emily said, walking in the door, staring at my puffy red eyes. "I have ice cream." she smiled. I threw myself at her and hugged her, sniffling and shaking with leftover sobs.

"Oh, Jules." she whispered. "I wish, I wish I could help. But I can't" she whispered, her brown eyes wide underneath her glasses.

"I do, though, have a movie." she said with a smile. i gave her a watery one back and we walked downstairs into my warm living room. She walked out and grabbed blankets and called the pizzaria. "I'm sleeping over." she told me, and I nodded.