A Nerdy Affair (a Dan Howell story)

Forgiveness and air guitar

Trekking up the stairs to my room, I cursed myself for leaving so little time to get ready. I needed to wash my hair, choose my clothes and find Jess all in the small amount of time we had left. Another worry that was niggling in my mind was what were Dan and Phil's friends going to be like? Anyone friends with those two must be nice but I still felt concerned. I never made good first impressions due to being a bumbling fool when I didn't feel comfortable with situations – which was always.

As I was just letting the shower water warm up before stepping in, I heard the front door slam and the sound of voices. At least that was one chore off my list. The water cascaded over my head as I stepped into the shower and I felt all the worry that had building up lift off my shoulders. The water was so hot that I may as well have been in the pits of hell, but I liked the slight burn, it was something to take my mind off the constant worry.

"Nice singing Nerd" Justin shouted through the door. Perhaps I should have sung All Time Low a bit quieter...

"Hey my rendition of Poppin' Champagne was so good Alex shall be calling me to do it with him on the next tour..." I called back. Justin just muttered as reply, I could just make out him saying something that it was a crime against music. Upon entering my bedroom, I was met with the site of Lizzy and Jess sat on my bed. "Guys, I'm kinda naked so if you could return once I was clothed that would be greatly appreciated" I said, trying to keep my cool. Jess could not see that I was totally unprepared for facing her due to repressing all thoughts about her for the last few days.

As they left I swiftly closed the door behind them and spun round to face the wardrobe. What was I meant to wear for Dan and Phil's? I looked through my variation of t-shirts that were hung up and they were pretty much all band merch or just plain vests. I went for a plain black vest with a checked shirt and shorts. Perhaps it was slightly too casual but I did want Dan to see me for who I was not try and trick him into thinking I was someone I wasn't as I wanted him to like me for me. I had now left myself with no excuse not to face Jess, but Izzie would be there and that would make it better.

Peeking my head round the corner, I saw the two sat on the floor outside my room in the corridor.

"Hey guys I'm done now, you can come back in" I tried to give them a convincing smile but I probably just looked like I had wind... Opening the door wider so they both could fit, Lizzy gave me a little smile as she walked through. That gave me the feeling that this wasn't going to be good.

"Justin told us that we were going out to dinner at Dan and Phil's tonight" Jess said, avoiding eye contact by rearranging my pillows on my bed "So Lizzy and I thought we would come and see if you needed any help with getting ready" With that statement she did look into my eyes. Her eyebrows creased slightly and a sadness, which vanished within seconds, covered her face. Maybe she did feel slight remorse for what she had done.

"Nope" Even if perhaps this was Jess' peace suggestion I was never going to let her anywhere near my face " I am fine with how my face looks right now thanks, I don't need to dress up to impress them" This statement was said with more venom that intended, but I couldn't suppress my annoyance at Jess for much longer.

"Ok, well we were only trying to help" Jess said this as if I had just kicked a puppy, her sickly act as if I was the one who had done something wrong here when we all knew what had really happened.

"Alright what's up with you two?" Okay so maybe not everyone knew. Poor Lizzy, she had just arrived to her cousins expecting to have a really chill couple of weeks in London with her best friends but had instead come down during the stupidest fight Jess and I had ever had.

"I slept with Tom when Gabs and him were on a break" Lizzy's laughter was not something I expected to hear from her as I stared at her incredulously.