My Memories of Life

Russian Earl Grey and Pimento Cheese

My good friend Claire and I were walking in the rain, which was coming down in droves. I had one of those huge umbrella's that can fit atleast three people comfortably underneath and we were headed to the tea-house up the street. I had told Claire I needed to tell her something. Something that had been bugging me for the past few months now. After what felt like forever, splashing in the puddles on the tree-lined sidewalk we finally came up to the tea-house doors. It was our favourite spot to have our bull sessions. It was quiet, and cozy and most of all warm. The dainty furniture fit perfectly in the few or so rooms one could see as they first walked in. Lilac-striped wallpaper hung on the walls and a roaring fireplace stood at the corner of the foyer. To this day I still love Lilacs.

We sat there by the windows, as the heavy rain pounded the glass. I watched the rain as it hit the glass. Glass separating me from the cold and wind outside. Next to us was a tiered sterling silver tray of little slices of cucumber sandwiches, some fruit here and there and my favourite; pimento cheese on a light corn-bread slice. Our steaming cups of tea sat before us as I took a deep breath and began.

"How to begin really... How to begin about life-times that you've lived." I said, still looking out absent-mindedly out of the window. "It isn't easy to remember the sad times but it is easiest to remember the happiest of times. So many have told me that I'm crazy and insane and need to stop "living in the past." Well, what if remembering your past helps you live your life today?" I pressed this question to her. She thought about it but couldn't give me an answer. I continued on, now clasping my hands to my cup of tea. "Having lived through many lives I'm so glad that this life really has no notable point or that I am a celebrity or a world leader. I'm so glad, so relieved to be me."

"Alex, if what you say is true... Of course I'm not trying to dis-credit you. But..." She mused, sipping some of her tea. It was a cup of her favourite. Russian Earl Grey. A flavour I remember so fondly from one of my life-times. A life-time she factored in prominently. I looked at her smiling slightly, still clasping my cup of tea. "But what Claire?"

"Well I mean, why not a life of a peddler or a beggar or a doctor? Why is it right off the bat a well-known individual? People would look at you funny. I mean, I know Re-incarnation is universally accepted now. Which is amazing and all..." She trailed off with a concentrated expression.

"But what?" I asked still smiling knowing what she would say. Claire continued, taking a linen napkin to her mouth, dabbing it slightly. "Well I mean Re-incarnation is based upon karma right? A cycle of karmic decisions and mistakes and triumphs and lessons." She pursed her lips taking another sip of tea. I looked at her as she looked at me intently trying to read my expression. "Yep. That's correct. A cycle of karmic decisions, and especially the last one you mentioned. Lessons. Many, many lessons. True it does make people look at you funny when you claim to have been so many well-known people in History. But at the same time even well-known people re-incarnate so it really isn't fair to say that we have all just been beggars and doctors in our past-lives." She looked at me smiling and stuck her tongue out knowing she'd encountered a defeat. "Well then Alex, please continue!" She said laughing, taking another sip of her Russian Earl Grey.

I laughed and sipped some of my tea while helping myself to a pimento cheese slice.

"When I look back I think about the decisions I made, why I re-incarnated into such life-times that I witnessed through my own eyes. You would think after a few I would have gotten the message. But I kept going in a cycle and it was always the same ending. Never being able to rise to the top as I wanted."

"So basically you were an ego-centric jerk in all of your lives!?" She laughed hard and shot me a look to tell me it was just a joke. I smiled and stuffed another piece of pimento cheese into my mouth. "Not true!" I said, slightly muffled because of the food in my mouth. I swallowed and then continued. She listened intently, her one hand resting on the table.

"The first life-time I can remember, I plotted to kill my best-friend and lover. He had me killed before that could have happened. And that is where it all started. Where it all began.