Behind The Mask

Cant I Just Be Myself?

   There were some nights Mia would think about going back to her normal self but for every

good thought,there was always a negative flashback from her past. Its not only her old

bullied self but every night she would realize all the mistakes she has done , she would go

back and think how she could have prevented that mistakes but she is clever enough to

know that every thing happened for a reason and realize that she has learned from every 

single mistake she has  done. 

The week after the first day of school Mia got a text from an old friend who was still on

contact with, she sent her many text telling her about an old classmate who Mia had

always helped , it seem to look like the girl mostly hated her as she saw the girl saying 

that she hated Mia that she would had bit up Mia but realized it wasnt worth it enough

at that instant Mia came in into a realization , she realized that no matter what she did or 

no matter how she looked she would always be judge and continue being hated and

used by the rest of the people.  That day Mia decided to stay on her room and cry, not 

because of the fake friendship she already knew about but the pain of being used,

the pain of had been so stupid and helped that girl for her ending, paying her by

talking trash about her. Miguel and Damian not seeing Mia at school got them worried 

and knowing the huge pain and unhappiness on Mia,they decided to go to her house

and talk to her but it was useless as Mia didnt wanted to see anyone she felt so hurt that

she was at the point she didnt trust Miguel and Damian , she got to the point of thinking

that they were just using her , like the rest of the people... that day Mia cryed herself

to sleep ,letting all the unhappiness out, that night her eyes became waterfalls of tears

and depression.

     The next morning Miguel and Damian went back to Mia's house and this time she did wanted

to see them but not on the way they expected ... once they got to her room, Mia unhappy and tired said

"Are both of you using me too? Why are yall even my friends? What do yall want from me? " 

surprised and amazed but upset both of them said "What happened?, Why you saying this

to us , we are here because we care about you and love you " Mia unhappily looked down

not wanting to look at their faces  "Mia tells us what happened now !!!!!!!!" Damian said 

with a Im sick worried about you face , Mia sitting silently with tears coming out of her

shiny brown eyes , Should I tell them she tought inside her mind They had always been

here for me they are the only ones I trust after all , after thinking about it for many minutes

she decided to tell them the whole thing , after she was done , her eyes become a  waterfall

of tears once again but this time she had Damian and Miguel by her side, "Dont lisen to her,

forget everything, thats the pass and look towards the future " said Miguel, crying Mia said

" Cant I just be myself " ....., "I cant be myself ,I cant be someone Im not , then what can I be...

What can I be ? ... I dont even know who I am in this cruel world anymore 

who am I ?.... What can I be ?.... Whats this so called life ......"