Unchanged - A Zarry fanfic

Chapter 5

Zayn and I sat quietly in the living room. The silence was heavy and I felt responsible for that, as if it was up to me to speak first.

“Um, Zayn,” I began, “about…before mum…in the kitchen–”

“Don't worry about it,” he cut me off. “Your mum’s awake, or back or whatever. That’s your priority. Everything else can wait until another day.”

I tried to smile but I was more than a little disappointed. I didn’t want it to wait. I wanted to continue, especially if he had been about to kiss me like I thought he had.

“I don't mind talking about it now,” I mumbled. Zayn raised an eyebrow.

“Okay…” he drew out the word. “Um, what do you want to um…say about it?”

I hadn’t thought about that bit.

“I…um…I think I might be bi…um…sexual.”

I focused on my hands in my lap.

“Why do you think so?”

How was I supposed to explain this? I could barely hear myself think with my heart pounding in my ears.

“Because there’s this guy that makes me feel…I don't know.”

“Okay. Have you ever kissed a guy?”

I shook my head. There was a brief pause.

“Do you want to try?”

My head snapped up. My eyes met his own. I nodded sheepishly. Zayn got up from his seat on the couch and walked over to me. I swallowed hard as he straddled my lap.

“Are you ready?” he asked. I nodded. There was no way I could speak. I was fighting my already stiffening erection. “Relax,” he whispered. And then, cupping my face, he pressed his lips softly to mine.

Every fibre in my body came alive in that moment. I was like a mixing pot of emotions – elation, exhilaration, wonder and that same sense of relief, of completion, that I had experienced when he had placed his hand on my shoulder, what felt like eons ago. Except this time it was in a much higher dose, washing through every corner of my body until I felt light-headed. And this time, when Zayn pulled away, I felt incomplete, with only the wooziness that came with the memory of the kiss.

“How did that feel?” Zayn asked.

“Incredible,” I gasped. Zayn smiled and scooted off me, returning to the large couch.

“Is that it?” I asked. My disappointment was very clear in my voice.

Zayn shrugged.

“Do you think you’re bisexual?”

“Definitely.”

“Then you’re bisexual. That’s it.”

I gaped at him.

“But did you have to stop the kiss there? It was so short! So abrupt!” I didn’t even care that I was making a complete fool of myself.

“Harry, doing anything now would be taking advantage of you–”

“No, it wouldn’t!” I cried, scurrying over to join him on the couch. He struggled to repress a grin.

“Yes, it would. You’ve just found out you’re bi, you’ve just broken up with you’re girlfriend, you’re mum’s better – you’re very emotional right now.”

“No, it wouldn’t!” I insisted. “Wasn’t I obvious enough? The guy I was talking about – that makes me feel ‘I don't know’ – it’s you. You’re the reason I’m bi, you’re the reason I broke up with my girlfriend, you can't take advantage of me! Not if I want it so badly…” I faltered because the way Zayn was staring at me was throwing me off. His eyes were fixed on my lips and burned with hunger.