THE GIRL

There once was a girl and she was practically ordinary yet weird, but the weird thing was that everyone was weird in their own way some chose to show it and others pretended that they weren't weird at all. And so everyone would find their right kind of weird, some straight away and many others through time.

Now this girl had found her right type of weird friends but the only issue was no matter what she tried to do there was no in between, she was either not fun enough or just too much for everyone to handle, she was either not very weird with everyone else or she was way too weird for anyone to even understand.

She always had a craving no matter what but she would have no idea what she wanted sometimes she would try fix it with shopping or food but the craving never really went away and she would have to deal with that every day , and each day could be different, one day she would completely and totally fine and the next she could randomly cry because she had no fucking idea what she wanted.

This girl always expected either perfection from herself or complete and total shit and as always she never got perfection and she would always give up , she gave up so easily most of the time , she hated giving up .She would hate herself for giving up and everyone else would tell her its ok and that she's human that it happens often but to her it happened all the time and whenever they would tell her that she must try again she would just break down .She didn't know why she could be so weak when it came to these things manly cause she could be strong for many other things but only when she had to make a decision in her life that affected her ohhhh she hated those moments in her life as she felt as if there was a mistake it would be her fault as she would blame herself because she made the decision.

She did have good days too but it would always lead to the dreaded sleep where her brain would go wild, so she would not be able to sleep just lay there suffering in silence and she would only fall asleep if her eyes could not stay open for another moment , and for a brief moment she wouldn't be in reality, she would drift off to a magical place where what and how much food you had would not affect your appearance the food was just yummy things that you put in your mouth to make yourself happy. Exams didn't measure intelligence, Santa Claus was real and so was magic, and she could like whoever she wanted girls, boys whoever and not be judged. For a brief moment she would think all of this is real and she was happy.

But then she would wake up.