From my Memories

The Free Bird.

The Free Bird.

Blue. That was the colour of her eyes. A soft, empty blue. Bluer than all the oceans. Bluer than all the skies. Bluer than anything I'd ever seen. And bright, oh, they were bright. I bet they made the stars themselves jealous. Or maybe they were stars. Maybe she was a star. 

She was staring at me, standing in the flower field. And I was staring at her, standing on the sunset-heated road. Though it pierced me, I wouldn't look away. I couldn't. What if I did, and when I looked back, she was gone? I wouldn't risk that. Not for her. She was the first one to move. Her eyes moved from mine, releasing me. But her stare remained. At something else? I looked up, to chase her beautiful gaze, but she was chasing something else. We both caught it. A bird. A white-winged, benevolent bird. Dancing in the sky; flushing it's delicate wings towards the gods. Perhaps to a different ballroom – one neither of us could ever see. Not that I ever wanted to. But what about her? As I was captured by her once again, I could see something different. Something that resembled pain. No, not pain, but … longing. Did she wish to be that bird? Did she wish to find a new ballroom? Did she wish to be free? Her hand answered, as her tiny fingers reached for the bird. And for a second, it looked like she could do it. Like she could close her bright, blue eyes and become the bird. Like she could fly away.

And I was walking. Over the old road, and into the flower-covered field. I was walking to her, and I could hardly control it. Not that I minded. I had just met her – no, just saw her – and she had already become the most interesting thing in my short, little life. But more than interesting – so much more. In a way I couldn't even describe. And a few moments later, I was in front of her. And she was staring at me, again. An endless, empty stare. I was trapped in her eyes. Trapped in her beauty. 

She didn't speak. No introduction. No sentence. No word. No sound. She just remained there, staring at me. It felt like I could leave, and she'd just stay there, forever, until she died. It'd be like watching flowers die. Sad. Disappointing. Cruel. But she almost seemed above death. 

So I said something, so she wouldn't die here. Hi. It was all I could think of, and I already felt inferior to her. I kept my gaze. Would she say anything? Could she even acknowledge me? Maybe she really followed that bird, or was dead like flowers. But then she said it. A simple wave. It was her voice. It was her sign of recognition. She hadn't become a bird. She hadn't died like a flower. She was here. Here with me. I couldn't help but smile at her – a full set of white teeth. I felt a burst in my chest. No, my stomach. No, my throat. My entire body. It was a sense of euphoria, that girl had brought me. She didn't smile back. But that was okay – she recognised me, after all. 

So I blinked. I looked away, for just a second. And surely enough, when I looked back, she was gone. It was like she was never there. But I remembered her soft, empty eyes. Her delicate, childlike hands. Her long, silver hair, that I hardly even noticed earlier. I remembered. She was here – even if it was just for a while. She was here. So my smile couldn't fade. I was happy – still happy. Did she become a bird? Did she find a new ballroom? Did she die like a pure, white rose? In this field of flowers? Or did she become a star? It actually wouldn't matter, what happened to her. Because she was here. She joined this place. And now, she was bound to it – through life, through death, or anything in between. She recognised me. Recognised this world. And that was enough for me to realise how beautiful this place really was. Really is. Really will be.

This truly was a beautiful world.