Criminal Law

Jane

"Why's the DA got to be such a dick?" asks the blond first year who doesn't quite get prosecutorial work very well but has a nice rack. I see why that one got the job. Allison? Maybe. She's doomed here. Two months and she thinks she's seen the extent of Brockwell's assholery. He would never cross me though, probably because of the camera incident. Hopefully I'll have his job within the decade.

"Jane, got the specs on the Jackson case?" It's Mark. Another employee who's better skilled at screwing than the law. "Yeah, and it's a fun one. Triple homicide of his three gardeners caught on camera. No defense there." I say, probably too gleefully. I can't help it; something about easy cases just gives me the warm-and-fuzzies. Mark, slinking away, gives my ass a squeeze. I can't blame him; I've been toying with him for months now, gently hitting on him and then feigning anger at his forwardness then fucking him then ignoring that the sex ever happened. It's a fun little game. He doesn't understand it at all.

The door opens and Brockwell enters the room, grotesque in an expensive suit that covers his pudgy but commandingly severe form. "Gardiner, get me some coffee" he calmly commands in his usual placid yet somehow belittling tone. He motions for me to follow him with his hand. As I approach, I see that he's smiling. "Jane! What a pleasure to see you this fine morning! Oh, do I have a present for you." An envelope appears from his redwell, unmarked and unaddressed. Hallmarks of something less than kosher. "Forty percent of the payoff" he says. God that's a lot of zeros. I count again to make sure. Five. Yep. "You should ask for more" I say, neglect the staggering value already in my hand, "and tell the dumbass that we can't accept checks for bribes. I would have thought that to be self evident." "Oh, and pray tell why you think he could pay more than this?" He asks me. He sure is slow. "The murder was of three gardeners. Anyone who has three gardeners and two or more houses can afford to pay more than a quarter mil." He looks vaguely blank. "How do you know he has two houses?" Oh my God this man is handicapped. "Lots of gardening goes on in Manhattan. Oh wait, no, it doesn't. Ergo, two houses." I say, not bothering to hide my growing exasperation."Tell him to double it, and he's got a deal. And I want fifty percent for getting you double the money. That still leaves you with an additional hundred grand. Sound fair?" He nods in acquiescence. "Good. Now to the simple matter of making him win an unwinnable case."