Blankets (A Larry Stylinson One Shot)

I am not a hardcore Larry shipper, I believe it is just a bromance and nothing more, but I felt like writing this.

WARNING

This one shot has suicidal themes to it, so if you aren't comfortable with that I suggest you don't read this and find a fluffy one shot with happiness and the feels all throughout it.

Blankets

The plane probably was here by now, and the other ds were greeting the happy couple with hugs, and telling them congratulations on the engagement.

And then there was me.

I was sitting in my oversized bathroom, wondering what it would be like if I just let go. Let go of the endless hate, the constant rumours being spread about me and women I've never even met. I don't even like girls, but management makes me say I do, or else I could ruin the stupid band's image.

Another thought pops into my head, another reason, one that surpasses the rest of them by far.

Louis.

He doesn't know, and never will if I die. He'll think it was the hate, or somehow it was just too much. The screaming, the mobbing, it's been getting to me the past few months, and they think it's just that, just the fans. They don't know it's my love for Louis, my stupid love for him.

My legs shakily carry me to the study, where I grab a piece of paper and cover it with lies. I say it's the hate, the rumours, and I know they'll believe me. Louis won't though, he knows me too well, even though we've grown apart the past year.

So I tear it up, and throw it in the trash.

The overused pen scratches words onto the new paper, the truth.

Louis,

This part of the letter is for you, don't let anyone else read it.

You probably think it's the hate that got to me, or the rumours, but it's not that really. It's you.

You made me feel like there was nothing better than life the first time we kissed. Do you remember that? It was so long ago, nearly four years ago. We were still sharing a tiny room with the others, and while they rehearsed, you offered to stay with me while I was sick.

You were still so innocent, like me. You didn't think you'd ever even like a boy, but you did, even though it was only for a few months.

Even though your feelings for me are long gone, my feeling for you are stronger than ever. Of course you always pick the worst times to mess with my heart, even without knowing it.

One time was when when we broke up, I was going to tell you I loved you that night over dinner, that messed with me.

Then you proposed, and I'm happy for you and Eleanor, I hope you have a great life together, but it still hurts.

It was like a knife to my heart when you took me to the jewelry store to pick a ring. You were so ecstatic, so I didn't say how much I regretted bring Eleanor to that party or what I would do to be anywhere but there.

I love you Louis, and I've loved you through every concert, through every single time you've disapproved of me getting wasted at a club.

That's why I'm doing this, so I won't have to suffer through another day loving you, or watching you marry her.

I'd probably cry in front of all those people, and you would laugh, calling me a baby or some other stupid phrase.

I love you, and this is my goodbye to, well everything.