All I've ever known was that my thighs touched more then the other girls did and that my arms jiggled way more then theirs did.
I realized that I didn't look as good in skinny jeans and crop tops.
I was big and 17 years later I'm still big.
Looking in the mirror has always been something I try to avoid but today's the first day of senior year so I had no choice.
I frowned as I tried to pull up my favorite jeans but they barely went past my knees.
"Fat ass" I said to myself
I took the pants off and threw them into the pile full of jeans I could no longer fit. I kept them hoping that maybe one day I would be able to wear them again but at the rate I'm going I would have to get my pants hand made.
I've tried everything from exercising to just going completely cold turkey on food but it seemed to just make me gain more weight.
I decided sweat pants was the right way to go today, I didn't care if it was hot. I grabbed my gray sweat pants and a blue T- shirt. I also let my hair fall at the side naturally not feeling like dealing wit it today.
I grabbed my phone and bag and went downstairs.
My mom was in the kitchen cooking breakfast, I went over to her and kissed her cheek.
"Hey hun, you hungry?" She asked so sweetly lord I loved that lady she the reason why I decide to keep breathing.
I decided to skip breakfast I just wasn't feeling eating this morning plus I was pretty sure I ain't need it anyway.
"Nah, I'm good mom but thanks" I said wit a fake smile. This lady will stress until her hair falls out if she doesn't feel like your happy.
"Well.... Okay hun" she said with a weary look on her face.
"Mom I'll grab something out of the vending machine okay?" I said so she doesn't be going all crazy.
"Okay.... You better" she said with a smile and grabbing my cheeks. I laughed a lil.
my phone then vibrated, it was a text from Ari.
Ari: if you dont get ur lil lightskin tail out here, the bus gonna leave you.
"I gotta go mom" I said before running out the front door and too the bus.
Ari was standing in the bus door way so the driver couldn't leave.
"You not finna leave my best friend Mr. Bus driver, not on the first day especially" said Ari
Ari was my best friend she been there for me since freshman year. The girl was straight ghetto but I loved her for that. She was a lil brownskin thing with long hair and big brown eyes. She was gorgeous, something I would never be.
I got on the bus and Ari jumped in my lap.
"If u don't get your lil Hershey bar lookin-" I tried to say but Ari put her finger to my mouth.
"Look hea malaysia, you not finna insult me wit a candy brand okay?"
I busted out laughing.
" look hea Ari, you not finna tell me what imma insult you wit cause imma insult u wit what I wanna insult u wit, ya dig?" I tried to copy her accent but I know I failed miserably
"You suck!" She said while jumping up off my lap and sitting beside me.
"I know" I laughed.
Soon we arrived at the school, I sighed at the dusty building. I also felt the stares of everyone around me which made me wanna run and hide but there was no turning back now.
YOU ARE READING
Big(Bryson Tiller Love Story)
FanfictionMalaysia: Fat has been all I've known and I never thought anybody could love or tolerate somebody who looked as disgusting as me, until I met Bryson tiller who taught me that being the "big" girl didn't mean a damn thing.