for the first time {markle}

for the first time.

Maya choked on the can of soda she'd been sipping from as she sat propped on top of her bed. She coughed a few times, her hand coming to rest on her chest as her breathing began to regulate. Her eyes then focused back on the boy sitting in the swirling desk chair across the room. She thought she'd heard him right the first time, but maybe her hearing had been clouded from the New York street outside. However, he was sitting there, staring at her with his eyebrows furrowed like the proposition he'd just made wasn't absolutely outlandish.

"Wh-What did you say?"

"I kind of figured I'd be past this coming-of-age milestone as well, but I haven't had a girlfriend since I broke up with Smackle last year. We never went all the way, you know? I went to prom alone..."

A cheetah print pillow collided with his chest. "You went with me!"

"I mean...that was platonic, and you told me not to expect anything more. You said...and I quote, 'When this is over, we're leaving this hotel. Got it? We're leaving, not staying.' Cited: Hart, 2020."

Maya pursed her lips. She did say that. In fact, she said it twice during pictures, once at dinner, three times during prom itself and then one more time for good measure in the cab on the way back to her apartment, even though they'd already left.

"So, what makes you think you should try this again what..." Maya counted back in her head, "Four months later?"

"You're the one that said, again, I quote, 'I can't believe Riley lost her virginity before I did. How is that possible? How did she even function? She said it was awkward and Huckleberry tried but how?' Cited..."

She cut him off, "Yeah, you don't have to cite me, I get it."

"Look, Maya." He was getting up and walking over to her, and for some reason, her heart began to pound rapidly in her chest. "I would never pressure you...ever. I've loved you since the day we met, and I'm not a total jerk. There's no love in force. We've known each other our entire lives, though, and I trust you...and I honestly believe that you trust me. You said it yourself, we start college in a week, and I also agree that we shouldn't go into it totally unprepared." He shrugged, "If you want to get it out of the way..."

Maya played with the end of her hair for a moment, glancing at the floor before looking back at the lanky boy sitting in front of her. He had a point. There was no denying that. With Farkle, there would be no pressure. They were just friends and they were both trying to just get through this together, something that was the basic idea of their friendship for years. Not to mention, she did trust him. She trusted him a lot. Hence, why she felt she could complain to him about how inexperienced she felt against her naïve best friend. However, she was still in a general state of shock. Was he still suggesting that they exchange virginities?

A long sigh escaped her throat after what felt like hours later, "I once made this comment to Riley...about how I knew...with you...I'd never get hurt. I still feel this way now..."

"Yeah?"

She nodded quietly, watching as his body inched closer to hers, listening to him closely. "I'm a scientist, Maya. I know exactly what biologically causes my heart to race when I'm around you, or what about you makes me want you in ways that aren't friendly at all...but...I suck at talking about my feelings...and I..."

"Okay."

His whole demeanor changed, his face knitting together in confusion and disbelief as he sat up a little more. He ran a hand through his short hair, "Wh-What?"

"You made a point. We both care about each other. This is safe...reckless, but totally safe." She pushed a piece of hair behind her ear, their blue eyes locking in on each other.