For The God Whom I Hate So Much (D.Gray-Man)

Prologue:

A/N, EDIT: SAT 05/06/2017: This is the first half of the first chapter. I deleted the original prologue.

- Prologue -

Way up in the clouds, a young girl hovered over all the trees of an Austrian forest. The blue, bright sky and the white, bright clouds as her background brought a refreshing look to her usually soft but now perturbed features. Her feet and arms facing downwards—locking straight and stiff. She allowed her Dark Boots to aggressively descend her into the forest below. The young girl regaining control in the nick of time before touching the ground.

Deactivating her innocence after finally landing, she immediately rolled herself in mud with a speck of hope that it'll conceal her scent from that thing following her any further. Rubbing the mud all over her clothes and a little over her face. She wouldn't give a dime back to those wicked people because of the mess she made of the pricey, exclusively tailored black and white uniform she wore. Despite the designer being such a kind and friendly fellow—he was one of them.

With the dragged out moment in time of waiting, bringing her torture even before being in the hands of her enemy, she barely allowed herself to breathe. The breaks she made of her holding her breath consisted of steadily breathing in and her exhales hitching out shallowly.

Shifting over to a tree with an excess of leaves at every end of the root of it as quietly as possible, Lenalee hid behind the bush in an additional attempt at assuring her survival. She waited and waited some more, her own body turning humid with the added amount of stress the immediate sight of that thing caused her. It barely gave her a chance at clearing her head. If it wasn't for her covering her mouth, her heavy breathing would've surely been the end of her by the hands of the predator tearing down trees in search for her.

She harshly patted down her head, blinking away the tears she felt sting her eyes. She thought to herself, "What to do? What to do?" Yet, she couldn't figure out what exactly needed to be done, the added on torture egging her breakdown on further.

However, to a shocking degree even to her, that thing apparently just couldn't find her—her assuming being its inability to track her down without the use of its sight—and it just, retreated in a flash.

When the intensity of its search for her came set in stone for prolonged antagonizing moments, Lenalee was just anticipating what the monster was going to do when it indeed found her. She never thought of herself as lucky—persistent maybe in the few days she had to her own of rediscovering herself as a rogue exorcist but separately as Lenalee Lee—but never lucky. Maybe then however, her living to see the next day was presumably out of sheer dumb luck. Especially since Akumas and that thing had been chasing her relentlessly for almost an hour. Never in fact consciously estimating her mental capacity either, so she surprised even herself when she was able to actually outwit her pursuers.

She never knew just how passionate she was.

Though recently, she was out of options when she concluded that only the bulky, terrifying thing was left for defeat. She couldn't find the courage—or energy—to confront it. That was when she knew it was about time for her demise.

She put up a good fight at least.

Again, she was never struck with a lick of luck, not in her whole life before now; thinking back on how her life played out stressed her unnecessarily further.

Yet, before her negative mind fully took over once more, she found herself subtly celebrating her victory against the thing then hunting her down, with a long, breathy, hot sigh escaping her lips and also with a low, "thank goodness." An almost overwhelming feeling of knowing that there was the occurrence of tipping the scale over to where that demon may never find her ever again brought the same amount of joy she felt when she first escaped that place that brought the end of her beforehand.

If she had a more twisted sense of humour, she'd think her faith was restored.

Hilarious.

It was an understatement to simply say that she enjoyed the moment of peace with herself though.

Her eyes narrowing at one single thought piercing her mind the next...

Bitterly, just as quick as she began celebrating beating the odds of her dying, Lenalee turned deathly afraid again of a subconscious threat that took over her thoughts. She began wondering what could've been, would've been, and even what should've been—her facing off with that thing before it succeeding in finding her itself, her finishing it off, or it finishing her; either or being better than waiting for death once again.

In a torrent of "what ifs" striking her mind one after another, Lenalee began hyperventilating. Lenalee began crawling away at her scalp. A infestation of bad memories and pessimism taking over her being. Something that she hoped she would've been spared of this time.

Her mind dragging her conscious over to the memory of her unison to Dark Boots, allowing her to ponder over what would've happened if she didn't have them.

Falling backwards and onto her behind abruptly, she began to shake uncontrollably. Banging her head against the tree. Moreover in that instant, she wanted the nightmare to end as soon as it started again. Her sadistic subconscious bringing her back to the red images of her complete memory of that time. Instantaneously turning her wistful.

She was already so tired, so tired of it all. Exhaustion already overpowering her consciousness.

-End of Prologue-

A/N: Hi! This has been a story I've been developing for Lenalee for over a month. I'm very tempted to make this an Allen x Lenalee story or a LaviLena story because the story would work well if it were to become one too or a gen fic focused mainly about her. (Although, Allen does play a rather big role in her life in this.) So far I've been biased in making this an Allen x Lenalee story since I feel like there aren't many good multi-chaptered fics about these two together and when there is, they're rarely done plus Allena's more of my OTP than LaviLena (which I'm sure has even less good fics about the two, that's why I have more fics for LaviLena in developing right now). I'mma still think about it, and I'll probably not take any suggestions.

Anyways, I hope this was good. Please comment, vote and share please!