2 - A Crap Ton of Money

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Most people have boring deaths. They are emptying the trash on a Tuesday morning at age 69, they feel a brief pang in their chest, then lights out!

They are getting into the bathtub (a ridiculously huge amount of people die in the bathroom) and there's a fall, a blood clot, a stroke. Lights out again.

Or my personal least-favorite. They find themselves staring up from a hospital bed at the exhausted faces of their loved ones while cancer slowly rots them from the inside out.

Cheerful, right?

That's how my mom went. She was only forty-years old when they found the tumor under her arm pit. It was only a quick month before she was gone.

I don't ever let myself think about it.

These twenty? Yeah, some of them would die in the ways mentioned above. But a few surprised me. One was going to drown in his own backyard pond in thirty years. Another was going to go by choking on a hamburger at McDonalds in ten. I laughed when I realized the cashier was going to accidentally get her hair stuck in a motor in fourteen years or so.

Okay, I know, its not funny. Except when it is.

Did I mention a few of the people in line were kids? I don't read kids. Its a policy. I suppose its just too sad. I hated thinking of these bright-eyed, chubby-cheeked littles turning into hairy, balding old dudes and saggy, baggy old gals. It was just too gross.

But it was even worse when the kids didn't turn into old people. When the kid had an encounter with a car in their future, or a fall off a bunk bed onto concrete. I did not want to see that. Not now, not ever.

But this couple was perfect.

I was going to make a crap ton of money off them.




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