He Fell

Crash!

The music stopped as we turned around to see our drummer passed out on his equipment.

"Keith?"

"Hey! Come get him out of here!"

"Does anyone wanna come up and replace him?"

Roger and Pete handled the situation fairly well, for the people they are, cracking jokes but still taking care of him. They did better than me. I just stood watching.

I always just stood and watched.

Most of the time, I just couldn't believe what I was seeing, but I wish I would've ran after him just once and made sure he was okay. Now I have to pay the price.

As I walked into our hotel room that night, I looked at his nearly comatose form. He had been dropped onto his bed, his sweaty clothes still stuck to his limp body.

I groaned in annoyance as I tried to wake him up, using every move in the book until I gave up. He wasn't gonna wake up for a while. "Really! Seven of them?! Do you have any idea how close you were to death just then!" I nagged to myself as I struggled to move him around.

"I might as well get your dumb ass into bed." I moved the covers and tucked him in, not bothering to change anything he was wearing. Too tired to really care anymore, I changed clothes and got into the bed next to him, turning out the one lamp that lit our room.

"Good night... I-"

I shook my head. I'm not saying that out loud! What if he heard me?!

*in the morning*

An alarm went off next to me and I groaned, slapping my hand around until I found the damn thing. I didn't wanna get up yet! I'd much rather sle-

"JOHN WAKE UP. HOLY SHIT."

I bolted up and out of bed, my terrible choice for nightwear showing off to the world. (Cough cough- he's wearing bright pink hearted boxers -cough cough)

"WHERE'S THE EXPLOSION?!"
"There is none. I just wanted to wake you up! I can't have you sleeping all day now can I?"
"Keith... I'm gonna fuckin' kill you."
"I love you too, Johnny!" He kissed my cheek, and I pushed him back onto his bed, growling menacingly at him.

"Oooo! Territorial! I like it~"
"Fuck off. I'm tired, and you know I am. Why did you wake me up so early?"
"Early? It's only 5!"
"FIVE IN THE MORNING IS EARLY!"
"Oh."
"When did you wake up anyway?"
"Just about the time you fell asleep. You snore really loudly."
"So do you asshole. And thank you for waiting 5 hours until you woke me up."
"Of course! I gotta let you have your beauty sleep!"
"Twat." I mumbled as I got back into bed, Keith getting up to sit on my stomach. "How'd you even wake up? Seven shots is way too much, even for a horse!" I groaned, hearing the old bed creak. He shrugged, "I don't know. I guess my body's just built up a tolerance for my acts!"

"That's bullshit, and you know it. You're gonna actually die one day. I hope you know that." I deadpanned, a hint of worry in my voice. "Nah! You're stuck with me, Johnny!" He cupped my face in his hands and looked into my eyes. I'm not gonna lie, my face was red as hell. "Awe, look 'ere! I made him blush!" He laughed and started to cough, turning away from me. "That's karma! Gettin' all up in my face, and now you're coughing up a lung!" He held up his finger and walked over to the bathroom, covering his mouth.

"Hey, Moonie, what's wrong?" My sentence faded out as I saw the sink covered in blood. Keith looked up at me, blood splattered along his chin. "I guess some jokes don't work out as planned..." He mumbled as his body shook. He looked as if he was gonna pass out again. "Not this time, you idiot! You're not collapsing out on the floor again! You better pass out in your own bed." I grabbed his arm and pushed him down into his bed, going back to grab a towel and wipe the blood from his face. "What did you do this time?! Too many shots for your liver?" He smiled and winced as he breathed in, "I don't think so.. I think this time it was the bleach." I stopped and turned to stare at him. "Bleach?! Are you kidding me? Keith, you're gonna die!"
"Oh shut up John! It was only half a shot anyway. I got about 50 quid for it." He looked down, feeling ashamed. "Seriously, I'm not taking care of you like this anymore. You're not even gonna make it to 30!" I washed off the towel and came back to put it on his head. "Now, you're gonna sit with this on your head for now. It's the best I can do. Once we get to the city, you need to go to the doctor."
"Yeah, yeah, thanks mum!" He scoffed, closing his eyes. At this point, I was furious, but I tried to not let it get to me. I laid back down on my own bed, turning to make sure Keith was still okay. I guess I couldn't stop giving him my attention. He needed it after all. And when we all stopped looking at him...

---

He just wouldn't stop. Whenever we had finished a concert or just nothing to do, he'd be off to the pubs, leaving everyone in the dust. We tried. I tried. Everybody tried to get him to stop. The doctor even gave him pills to help him! But there was a problem with everything we did to help.

The pills weren't supposed to be left alone with him. The doctor shouldn't have given them to him. Plus, he was already too far gone in his mind by the time we caught onto the "go help your friend" train, and by then he'd given up. Everyone had showed such a lack of concern for him that he thought his life was some useless game! He drank, partied, fucked, and just went all out anyway he could! I wanted to catch him before he went and say the words I've been meaning to say for over 10 years, but as I saw him walk out the door on that last recording day, I just couldn't gather the courage to go up to him.

So, I let him leave. I let him take the final steps towards the edge, and I watched him fall. I let my little moon fall through the atmosphere and crush my heart into a million fragments. I honestly don't think I ever recovered.

There's times where I still feel like he's there, you know? When I'm sitting in bed, thinking of the light at the end of the tunnel, I hear someone. There's never anyone there but there's a voice. This voice that always says, "You'll be okay. Just come with me." I don't know when that will be, but hopefully, it's soon. I'm getting tired, and that voice sounds more comforting every day.