1.)I'm glad I know sign language, it's pretty handy.
2.)I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.
3.)How did I escape Iraq? Iran.
4.)I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.
5.)I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.
6.)Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.
7.)Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She ran away from the ball.
8.)I'm emotionally constipated. I haven't given a shit in days.
9.)I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
10.)Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. Dirty Bastards.
11.) My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned: couldn't concentrate.
12.)What was Forrest Gump's email password? "1forrest1"
13.)A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.
14.)Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? He wanted to win the No-bell prize!
15.)I wanna make a joke about sodium, but Na..
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Should I even continue writing this book?! XD
