Your Love's a F*cking Drag (But I Need it So Bad)

Chapter One

If there was anything Dan knew about himself, it was that he would prefer sucking smoke into his lungs like some sort of toxic breath rather than talking to anyone. He quite enjoyed the way black clothing made his pale skin even more so, and he liked the way leather felt against his skin when he wore his favourite jacket. He also knew that he had sewn stupid patches on another jean jacket as a way to look more edgy, even if those patches were literally just stupid little nerdy things but somehow still pulled off his aesthetic. He also knew that he hated his curly hair and straightened it every day to avoid looking like a hobbit.

But there was one thing Dan knew about himself all above the others, and that was the fact that he really wanted to bang his roommate.

Which is quite ironic, actually, considering Dan is completely, 100% straight and has even had a smoking hot girlfriend for a few months. Not to mention the fact that Phil himself is also completely straight and has been dating a girl for far longer than he really cared to know.

So why is it that Dan always finds himself on his knees in front of Phil with his mouth wrapped around his roommate's dick? Especially if they were both heterosexual?

The answer was simple: bros help bros out. And sometimes, giving a simple brojob doesn't hurt.

Dan remembers the moment they started their little fiasco, exactly a month after they moved into their dorms. They got along, sure, but they were two completely different people, Phil being a massive nerd and Dan with a cigarette hanging from his lips at all times, so they didn't particularly hang out all too much. They simply just shared a room.

It was bound to happen one day, honestly. Men had needs to be satisfied; girlfriend or not. By then, Dan had been dating Cheryl since the first week of school and he couldn't be happier. If he needed something sexually, Cheryl would gladly sustain him.

And Phil? He had been dating his woman for much longer than Dan had (the amount was still unknown) and was in a long distance relationship, only being able to see her once every month or so. Cue a sexually frustrated 17 year old.

Dan had just gotten back from hanging out with a few friends, his clothes reeking of cigarettes and cheap cologne as a way to hide his addiction from his dorm mother. It didn't really matter anyways, considering the stench was pretty bad either way, but at least he tried. He thought he was being relatively loud, his keys jangling as he tried to slide it into the lock before dropping it on the floor in a flurry of metal and exclamations of "shit". Finally, after many moments of fumbling, he threw the door open to reveal Phil sitting on his bed, jeans down his thighs, with a hand wrapped around his dick.

"Dan!" He squeaked, jumping so fast that Dan could barely process what was going on. He faintly noticed the thin sheen of sweat on Phil's brow, making his black fringe stick to his skin like glue. He yanked his underwear up and hid under the bed sheets, looking completely mortified. "I thought you would be gone longer!"

"Uh-," Dan couldn't really comprehend what he'd just walked in on, but there was something gnawing at his stomach that made him feel a bit weird. Guilt? But more than that, he had the scary urge to help Phil finish what he'd started.

Did that make him gay? No, definitely not. He loved women with a burning passion, and just because he felt the need to help his friend out definitely did not make him gay. He was as straight as an iron rod.

"Sorry," he finally got out, dragging his tongue over his lower lip. He allowed his eyes to glance over his roommate, studying him with an intensity that Dan never knew he had before now. Phil's glasses were on the table next to his bed, showing his blue eyes that were so full of shame that it made Dan slightly pity him. His cheeks were the colour of roses against pale snow, a nice contrast to his onyx hair. At last, he made a decision. "Do you need some help?"

Phil looked completely shocked, to say the least. "Do Iwhat?!" Dan couldn't tell if that was a good or a bad exclamation.

He smirked anyways. "Do you need help?" He asked slower. As if to show his point, he made jerking motions with his hand next to his crotch, miming masturbation. "We're bros right? Friends gotta help each other sometimes." He stepped closer as if to prove his point.

Phil dragged his teeth across his bottom lip in thought, making the skin shiny with spit. "No homo?" He asked hopefully, fingers dancing along the covers as if he was about to expose what was underneath.

"No homo," Dan confirmed.

His roommate let out a deep breath, his clothed chest expanding and releasing before he removed the sheet in one swift motion. Dan noticed that his fingers were shaking as he tried to pull his jeans down again, making Dan raise an eyebrow and put his hand over Phil's, giving him a large grin.

He couldn't believe he was about to do this.

"Let me do the honors," he purred instead, pushing his worries to the side along with Phil's jeans. It was the first time he's ever come face-to-face with another man's dick, which was a bit strange to think about in Dan's opinion. This being said, he couldn't really help but stare.

Phil started to fidget under his gaze, moving his legs as if he was trying to cover himself up. "Dan?" He whispered, and Dan saw him pouting from the corner of his eye.

He smirked once more. "Sorry, mate, you're just a lot bigger than I expected." And with that, he took Phil's cock in his hand (with a surprised moan from Phil) and started to lightly stroke, making sure to do the same movements as when he practiced on himself.

Giving a handjob to someone else was rather strange because there's a penis, but you couldn't actually feel anything to make sure it felt good. Dan judged his performance by how many moans he could elicit from Phil by the time he finished. However, to his disappointment, Phil seemed to be rather quiet, even as Dan swiped his thumb over Phil's slit, just letting out a soft sigh.

Obviously, to a competitive person like Dan, this wasn't good enough. So he did the only thing he could possibly think of in that moment: he took the head of Phil's dick in his mouth and started to suck lightly, almost as if he was sucking on a lollipop.

Phil let out a throaty moan and his hands flew to Dan's hair, tugging violently. The action made Dan hum in victory and take more of him into his mouth, trying to get over the fact that he was actually sucking a dick and therefore just enjoying the fact that he could make Phil moan like this, putty in his hands (well, mouth, apparently).

"Close," Phil whimpered after a minute, his hands getting tighter in Dan's hair. His hips started bucking a bit, making Dan gag unpleasantly so he gripped them in an attempted to hold them in place while taking his roommate's cock deeper into his mouth.

There was a weird taste in Dan's mouth, and he realized quickly it was because Phil was coming, letting out a loud whimper of Dan's name. Dan pulled off with a grimace and spit it on the floor, thanking the lord that they were linoleum and therefore easy to clean. "That tasted a bit strange," Dan commented, rubbing his mouth on the back of his hand.

Phil had a weird expression on his face, one between bliss and absolute horror.

"You okay?"

He blinked his blue eyes before turning to Dan and whispering, "Did we just cheat on our girlfriends?"

Dan snorted in reply. "No, Phil. It's not cheating because we're both straight and just helping each other out a little bit."

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely positive." After a moment of thought and staring in distaste at the mess on the floor, he added, "But we probably shouldn't talk about this with anyone else anyways. It can be our little secret."

And maybe Dan didn't really know what he was getting himself into, but at the moment, he just didn't fucking care.

-

A/N: Okay so @whalefairyfandom12 and I have been working on this quite a bit and we decided to FINALLY publish it to wattpad. I write in Dan's point of view and she writes in Phil's! Hope you all enjoy cuz we sure do (: