Nicotine (A Brendon Urie fanfiction)

Chapter 1

I woke up to the sound of my phone going off. I saw it was from Brendon, and like every other time I got butterflies in my stomach. I wish I didn't feel the way I do. It kills me to think that I will be nothing more than a friend to him. I pick up my phone and flipped it open. I go to my messages and I noticed the time 3:30 am. This was nothing new he barely ever slept.
Brendon: are you asleep?
Me: No not now
Brendon: I can't sleep
Me: well I'm awake now
Brendon: come outside
Me: uh.......why?
Brendon: just come outside

I rolled my eyes and removed the warm blankets from my torso. I was then greeted with freezing cold air. I ran across my floor quickly to my closet and grabbed a jacket. I put on some sweatpants since I was in shorts and quietly went down the stairs. I looked around to make sure neither of my parents were up, which was stupid considering the time. I unlocked the door as quiet as possible and stepped outside. It was freezing , I thought it was cold inside,I said to myself.I walked around to the garage area and saw Brendon's car. I ran to it and yanked the door open before quickly closing it. "It's freezing out here, what's up" I spoke between shivers. "I couldn't sleep so I wanted to come see you" he spoke. I tried to hide the blush that was appearing on my cheeks but I didn't have to because it was dark. He reached up and turned on the light on the ceiling of the car. I looked over at him, how can someone be so perfect. His hair was messy and he was wearing the same clothes he had on at school earlier. I would normally be mad for being woken up a few hours before I had to go to school. But for him I would give up sleep. I of course looked horrible. My hair all over the place and you could tell I was extremely tired. Him on the other hand looked perfect. "So what do you want to talk about?" I say quietly. "Well you know how we performed for Pete wentz?" He spoke clearly hiding excitement. "Yeah, what about it" I spoke clearly interested now. "Well he wants to sign us" he spoke
"oh my god Brendon for real!!!" I practically screamed. "Yeah" he spoke in the same tone. "That's amazing Brendon I told you you guys were amazing." I said hugging him. "I know you did but I never really believed it" he said hugging me back. "Well if y'all are getting signed that means y'all will eventually have a tour" I spoke. "Yeah but we have to record the album first." He spoke back. "Well I'm extremely happy for you" I smiled brightly at him. His hair had fell back down in his face and I moved a few pieces away with my hand. He just looked at me and smiled. Now it was impossible for me to hide the blush rising to my cheeks. Everything about him was perfect. His voice, his smile,his laugh, everything. I didn't care what anyone said. He was perfect to me. I stared at him for a few seconds before turning and facing the window. He tapped on my shoulder and I turned around. Before I could ask what he wanted his lips pressed against mine. I didn't believe in sparks but if they existed this is what they were. I practically melted as soon as I got over the shocked feeling. He pulled away and just looked at me with wide eyes. "B-Brook I'm sorry I don't know what came over me" he spoke all it once. "It's okay Brendon" I spoke. "I should probably go home and let you get some sleep" he said quietly. "Okay" I said quickly I told him bye and went back in my room. I couldn't sleep all I could think about was that kiss. A few hours later my alarm went off and I had to get up for school. I was completely exhausted but I knew there was no since in faking a stomachache. I stepped onto the cold hard wood floor and went to my closet. I grabbed a random shirt,my favorite black hoodie, and a pair of skinny jeans and went into my bathroom to take a shower. After I was dressed I quickly dried and straightened my hair and did my makeup. I slipped on a pair of converses and grabbed my backpack and waited for Brendon outside. Yes, I know I should have my own car but my parents don't trust me. They think I will skip school which is completely true. He pulled up and I quickly got in the seat beside him. I didn't really talk to him and he didn't really say much either. It wasn't abnormal considering the fact that it was 6:30 In the morning and neither of us had gotten much sleep. He looked worse than I did.His eyes were cloudy and he looked exhausted. To me he still looked perfect.We got to school and parked. We usually got there around this time every day. We had about 30 minutes before we needed to get inside so we sat in the parking lot. "So about last night" he spoke. "It didn't mean anything, it was an accident and I'm sorry for the way I acted" that completely shattered my heart but I had to play it off like I was okay. It didn't work though because tears soon started to fall down my cheeks. I turned to face the window to hide my face. "Are you okay" he spoke leaning forward trying to see my face. " yea, I'm fine" I said between sniffs. "Why are you crying?" He said with worry in his voice. "I don't know Brendon maybe because that kiss meant something to me and obviously meant nothing to you, or maybe it's the fact that I'm completely in love with you" I yelled. I soon regretted what I said. He looked at me shocked. "Brook I-" he began to speak before I cut him off. "Don't worry Brendon I get it." I said quickly grabbing my bag and slamming the car door shut. I ran inside the building and into the bathroom to collect my self before class. Soon after the bell rang and I walked to my first class. Unfortunately it was with Brendon. Instead of sitting in my normal seat in the back beside him. I sat in an empty seat In the front. He looked kind of sad when I looked back at him. I didn't care though I couldn't talk to him. I just spilled a secret I had been keeping for years and probably just ruined my friendship. For once I did my work because I wasn't in the back laughing with Brendon. When class was done I walked quickly out the door before Brendon could say anything. I avoided him almost all day until the end of the day. I walked out of my last class and saw Brendon waiting for me. I was actually surprised considering how I had been a complete bitch to him all day. I couldn't help but to let a smile creep on my face when I saw him. "Hey" I spoke quietly. "Hey, what do you mean hey you have ignored me all day" he practically yelled. "Brendon I'm sorry but you wouldn't understand" I spoke almost in a whisper. "Well you can tell me, last time I checked I was your best friend." He looked at me with a little bit of hurt in his eyes. "That's the thing." I said walking out the door at the front of the school. "What does that mean?" He stopped me from walking and looked in my eyes. "I kind of accidentally told you in the car a secret I have been hiding for years." "I didn't want to make it any worse so I just avoided you." He looked down at me and began to speak. " I have honestly felt the same way about you, I was going to tell you but I didn't get the chance you were too busy avoiding me" I looked up at him kind of taken back. "Wait what?!?!" I said quite loud drawing some attention from people walking to their cars. He laughed and pulled me towards his car. I got in and he began to speak. "I do feel the same about you, but I've got a lot of stuff to do,this is one of the best things that has happened to me." I started to speak but he continued. " I don't want to start a relationship with you when I'm going to be busy all the time." I was hurt by what he said but I understood. "I get it" I spoke sadly. "If I still feel the same by the time I get back I will come see you and if not well, you get it." "Yeah" I spoke beginning to cry. He reached over and wiped the tears from my face and gently placed his lips against mine before pulling away and starting the car.

Hey!!!! Sorry if this sucked but It will get better. Some things may be out of order because I'm just basing this chapter off facts I have heard of. Sorry if any things mixed up or wrong but I will try and fix it if it is.
Xoxo, Gracie