Psy Ren: Masterpiece (Gravity Falls)

Chapter 3

"What have you done?" Dipper asked, looking at the five Stans in front of him.

"Oh, you know, nothing special, I just cloned him so that I could control the clones, y'know, normal things that I do to my dates," she said, admiring her own nails.

"Why would you do that?" Dipper asked, his eyes wide.

"He was trying to hit on me," Ren said, rolling her eyes.

"Oh..."

"Tell you what, Dipper," Ren smirked, "If you can answer five questions, each with progressing difficulty, correctly, you may have your uncle, sister, and manchild returned to you. If not, then I'll kill you!"

Dipper chewed his nails. "Fine."

"Oh, and by the way, if you answer all of them correctly, then you will be the first person to survive the quiz. Are you ready?" She asked. "Good," she said without waiting for an answer.

Cheesy game-show music played in the background. Bah bump ba bah bah bump. Another wall panel slid to reveal a huge screen saying 'Life or Death With Your Host, Wren!"

"Oh, great," Dipper said, rolling his eyes.

Ren hopped off the couch with a huge smile on her face. "Okay, time for our first question! What are the names of the Borgmatic Brothers?"

Dipper thought of the statue that Granule Stan had bought a couple of weeks ago.

"And through here, we have a statue of the Borgmatic Brothers, Brian and Bjorn..."

"Brian and Bjorn!" Dipper yelled.

"Coooorect!" Ren replied. "You have survived the first round, both literally and figuratively. Now, for the next question. What color of hair does Deep Chris from Sev'ral Timez have?"

Dipper bit his fingernails. He didn't like Sev'ral Timez, but he remembered back to the posters in the attic, and how every member had blonde hair.

"Blonde hair," he said.

"Coooooorect!" Ren replied. "Congrats, as most people are dead by this question. On to number 3. What are the lyrics to the song Disco Girl by Icelandic pop sensation BABBA?"

"Oh my god, I love BABBA!" Dipper exclaimed, fanboying.

"OMI, me too! I though that no one else listened to BABBA! They are like totally my fav!" Ren said, walking over to a pretty pink cabinet, taking out twenty different CDs. "I have like there entire deluxe collection. I listen to it every night!"

"Me too! This is awesome," Dipper said.

"Y'know what?" Ren said, looking directly at Dipper, "I think that I can give you your uncle back, on one condition."

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the one-night-only official concert of RenDipTion, the ultimate BABBA tribute band," Soos said, sporting his mint-green headphones. Wendy, Mabel, and the rest of the crowd cheered as Dipper and Ren prepared to perform on the moldy deck of the Mystery Shack, almost at midnight. They made eye contact and nodded, lifting their mics.

The music began. First, the piano with its glittering arpeggio, and then the drums and guitar kicked in.

"Disco girl, coming' through, that girl is you! Ooh oooh, ooh oooh!"