And we just go in circles (Haylex)

Final letter

I stared at the ceiling, wondering if I have eaten last night or not. My back and nape was aching due to the uncomfortable foam of the couch. Since then, I never dared to sleep in the bed. Funny how I always expect that I'm gonna wake up in the bedroom, Alex sleeping peacefully next to me.

The house has gone silent. Somehow, I enjoyed my new solitary life. It's actually been so long since I had no one to talk to. Usually, I strike up a conversation to the taxi driver or someone beside me in the bus.

My eyes wandered aimlessly. Snippets of memories crossed my vision. In the table, Alex and I are laughing loudly while playing a board game. Probably Monopoly or Uno. On the stairs, Alex and I are pulling off shoes and put them nicely to the side. In the kitchen, he would always wash the dishes while I fry eggs and bacon. Sometimes, he helps me bake muffins.

Now, this house is so silent as though no one even lives here.

My arm hang down the couch, almost reaching to the carpeted floor. The sun glared at my face, making me wince. I wasn't even sure if I slept or not. Even in the past few nights, I'm starting to worry that I'm unconsciously staring at nowhere till the sun rises.

Lazily, I looked up to the wall clock that Alex and I bought when we went to some shitty store. 2 pm. Wow, am I really losing it?

Closing my eyes for a minute, I sighed. I rested my arm on my eyes to cover the brightness. Suddenly, I heard a familiar ring near my right. I was surprised. It felt like it's been centuries since I heard my phone ring. Who could that be?

Perhaps it's my mom. I'm sure she's gonna shout at me for not doing anything or visiting. Or maybe it's Taylor. Which reminds me, we have a show later. Around eight-thirty, I guess. The thought made me want to cancel it. I love our fans, I really do. But I don't want to disappoint them because of my lack of hyper. I'm just gonna fake it.

Wait, the phone is ringing.

Slowly, I sat up and reached for the mobile. I straightened my back and hear a satisfying crack. I pressed 'accept' without bothering to look at the caller.

"Hello?" My voice cracked a little due to my dry throat. Of course, I have not move my mouth for almost a day. Rubbing my eyes, I get up and walk through the kitchen.

"Hey," he responded. I almost dropped my phone. My legs stopped abruptly. My breath hitched. The voice. That awful voice.

Alex.

I wanted to cry, shout and dance in joy. My emotions are so mixed it remained steady. My face was hard as stone. Why is he calling me? Why just now? How many times have I write a letter for him to talk to me?

"W-What do you want?" I tried. I tried so hard to make my voice stern so I don't appear weak but it failed. I hear him shift uncomfortably. It reminded me of our first meeting. I already knew he liked me because of Jack. I always see him pushing his friend to me. It was cute.

"Uh, it's my friend's birthday today and he said he wants to meet you," My heart skipped a beat. I could feel my hands shaking "He's gonna throw a house party tonight around eleven. Do you want to come?"

The silence was deafening. Our breaths communicated. The atmosphere was tense that it makes me want to run away to somewhere. Did he forget what he had done yesterday? How could he act this way as if this week never happened? Two whole weeks of torture and this is what I get? My mind was practically yelling at me to curse him. To hate him. To reject him. But stupid me answered "Okay."

After that, I hang up and threw my phone out of anxiety. The smash woke me up into reality. I stared at the remaining pieces of my new mobile. I bought that two weeks ago. But not a single fuck flew. Everything doesn't even matter anymore.