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To my dear love, this is dedicated to you ~

Waking up to feeling disappointed as i knew the holidays were going to be a boring one for me . i had no one to go out with,no one to talk to . my friends were all busy with their schedule . the only place i could let everything go was my dance studio . there,i felt freedom, i felt like flying everytime i danced . it was heavenly . i would go there from afternoon till about, night time . well,that was my daily routine for the holidays . somehow , i had a bad and good feeling about this few months .

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My love life .. well i could say that things werent going as planned . I was dumped by a guy i was dating for 2 months, but fortunately there was someone who helped me cheer up through those hard times . His name was Daniel . He was too kind to me that i felt as if i didn't deserve it . Little did i know the story behind him .

Everytime i was depressed and crying,he would come online on facebook and talk to me .later,i knew that i had a crush on him . A few weeks later,i found out that he had been dating another girl from the same school as me for 8 months . you could'nt imagine my condition from then on . other than my love life,i was distracted by personal problems . Every single day,i would feel useless,worthless,like no one wants me,rejected . some people want to understand but i'm not sure how to tell them . And yes,i have thought of suicidal,but i figured that it wont do any good . i have lived my life like that since then , and no ome came to help me,eventually,i stopped trying .

          Till 21st December 2012

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It was a saturday, i was carrying out my daily routine,where i happened to be online on facebook , and i posted something about giving rating or comments to friends who liked my post . I had about 14 likes, and so for i commented on them . A few minutes after my post, a guy named Ahmad Fadil, suddenly sent me a message through facebook chat . His first sentence was , "hello, can we be friends ?" since i knew and recognized him from my previous school,i accepted his request . Since then, we got to know each other better,asked each other about ourselves and we became closer . i knew i knew him from the moment we met . And when i talk to him,it feels as if i know him from a long time ago . Like we were meant to be .. i never had this feeling before . i knew he was the 'bad boy' but i disnt care about his appearance or whatever . what i cared was his attitude towards me . after a few weeks of talking, i picked up the courage to ask him, "can i ask you a question ? who do you like ? " he then answered after some time, "uhm, someone.. how about you ? " i then replied that i had no one to like to and that i gave up on love amd wanted to concentrate on other things . i then asked him again . i knew he hesitated but then , "okay i'll confess that i liked you since the time you were with your ex boyfriend",which was a few months ago . i couldnt believe it . the most surprising thing he said was that he apologised for liking me . i didnt understand why he had to apologise,  he did not do any thing wrong .

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After awhile,i figured that i couldnt just reject him without thinking . i would have to consider it too . i told him to give me time and yet,after that,fortunately, we continued being friends like usual . He , too said that he would want to get to know me more before taking any further steps .

A month passed ....

It was January,we were bestfriends and still had feelings for each other . He wanted to date me,but was too shy too even ask or open about the topic . Finally,i took up the courage and asked if when are we going to get together . He said "i'll ask you on a certain date ." it was cute of him to even think of a date, and so on we continued our relationship as friends but still had feelings for each other . soon,a month passed by . February . i was still patiently waiting for him . i wasnt going to give up .

25 February 2013

My heart was beating fast and i had a uneasy feeling about something i just did not know what was it . Then, Fadil texted me "hey,mind if i ask you something ? " i replied a few minutes later , "yea sure " i was nervous of what he was going to ask . My hand was shivering and i was quiet the whole day . Finally, he answered... "Do you mind if we .. you know,be together every single second,every single day ? To love each other forever ? what i keant is,do you want to be my girlfriend ? "

i was too shocked . i took an hour to reply . when i had the courage,i said , "YES OF COURSE "

from then, the two strangers, who became one not long after,went on a journey they did not expect to ride . Romantic,love,sweet and funny moments were cherished,but we did not expect such problems to appear suddenly ....

End of part one ~