Madferit

"Happy days! Nice one!"

                  

I'd been on my own for a few years now. From the shitty bedsit to the slightly roomier flat I shared with Louise, I was happy to be completely out of that fucking house.

            It was definitely good to be free.

            "I'm not fuckin' goin'!" She barked.

            My eyes widened in disbelief. "What the fuck d'ya mean you're not goin'?" I asked. "I've already bought your bloody ticket for fuck's sake!"

            "Don't even try that shit, you fuckin' arsehole! I told ya I didn't wanna go but you wouldn't fuckin' listen!"

            She'd been doin' this shit for a while now and it was doing me fuckin' head in so much it was all I could do to stay calm. We had row after row but yet we still hadn't called it quits. I figured she'd leave or kick me out. I was banking on the latter if I'm honest.

            And then it'd be back to Mam's I'd have to go.

            Our Paul still lived there. I personally reckoned he always would. Even with working on the gas lines and that he could've gotten his own place but it was much easier to stay at Mummy's.

            Then of course there was our Liam who was following in Paul's footsteps. He still had the excuse of being in school though. They let him stay on a bit longer than most. He'd got kicked out for fighting – summat to do with being hit over the head with a hammer. Well, he didn't have the hammer. It was the other kid. Actually, I think there were three come from some school down the road. One of them brought a hammer and gave Our Kid a proper good conking right on his melon. Nearly bled to death...at least, that was the general consensus from all the spectators. My only hope from it was that maybe now he finally got some sense knocked into him.

            So he was off school for a few months and our mam had to fucking deal with him even more than she already did. The headmaster suggested Liam go to some alternative school where he could do things like rowing (in regards to boats, that is). What the fuck kinda school is that? And how was it fair that he got options like that and I didn't? I suffered through taking a fucking French course because the curriculum director felt it necessary. Où était mon putain de bateau?

            But Our Kid wasn't arsed for changing schools. He was the cock of the school he already attended so you can imagine why he didn't want to go anywhere else. And it was up to our mam to make sure he got his way. She begged the headmaster at the Barlow RC to take him back and of course...what our Liam wanted, our Liam got.

            At seventeen, he was at the point to leave school especially since he had no plans for A Levels. Mam was already looking into finding him a job since y'know he just wasn't able to do it his fuckin' self.

            Our Liam had always been Mummy's little boy and he fucking milked it for all it was worth. He was supposed to be a bird. Mam was sure he would be and I hoped she was right. I wanted a sister so fucking badly but I could count on one hand the number of times I ever got what I wanted.

            I was there when he was born. There to hear the doctor say, "It's a boy!" My life as I knew it was over.

            And then came the crowding. For whatever reason, Mam thought it fair to give Paul his own room and make me share with Liam. How the fuck is that supposed to be fair?

            "He's the oldest." Mam tried to reason.

            Fuck off!

            I spent however many years stuffed in that room with that little shit and at eighteen I was fucking out of there...even if I only moved across Burnage.