Sensei just be with me! (Kakasaku) (being edited)

Chapter 2 - my theory

I've always tried not to cry but it seems I can't help it. I've tried to be strong and it worked for along time but ever since the war ended and Naruto beat Sasuke in their battle I have just been devastated. And now my sensei my teacher my master ... Is MIA... Missing in action. Oh how I've prayed every day to kami that he would be safe and stay safe. But it seems fate has decided to take him away.

I remember his smile, or at least what I could ever see of it, the soft curving lines if his lips under the black material that covers his face.
His silvery grey hair that was always to perfectly spiked and his kind eyes when used in a smile. His nervous idiosyncrasies how he brushed a lock of hair behind his ear either when he smiles or smiles awkwardly.
I sighed I had calmed down my eyes must be a little blood shot. My lip quivered. My breaths were shaky. How much longer will I have to wait to see him again.

I must try out some tests to see if I can learn anything from the liquids that have been sent to me in the most unique way.
I have this inkling feeling its from kakashi but I don't know. I bit my lip thinking. My hands in tight fists. I paused out side the door of Tsunade's office. I heard soft voices a male and a female with the hint of a second woman. Perhaps shizune?

"Please come in Sakura" hokage said. Her golden blonde hair glistened in the sun. Her green robe draped over the back of her chair her arms folded across her chest pushing her already large breasts up. I'm sure the late Shannon jiriya would be creating a pool of blood on the floor.

"Tsunade-sama" I said shyly.

Naruto stood in the corner leaning against a wall. He didn't look to happy his bottom lip stuck out in a childish pout. Hinata clearly hadn't told him yet and since earlier to day a small smile crept across my lips.

"I have a mission for you" she said. I had guessed as much but I felt shocked none the less. What about my testing!! I feel I'm at the cusp of a breakthrough. Wait - I can't tell her she'd get the other ANBU on it and I'd loose my only remaining hope. I can't loose control of how people come and go from my life. I can't loose anybody else- not any more and not this way!

"Yes ma'am" I said covering up my shock. I must try to regain composure. Naruto suddenly looked over I glanced at him, he stared at me knowingly. We shared this same pain. Again and again team 7 would be tested and changed and rebuilt. He knows what I'm feeling.

"It's to the land if snow you have to collect something from a member of the family of a young girl in hospital" she stopped when shizune handed me the mission file. "Naruto has been briefed". Land of snow is where Kakashi was last seen. I clenched my fist around the file. I know I could make a break for it and ditch this mission.

"Before you say anything, I am not allowing you to go and look for him, swerving off the path that this mission is giving you to follow will result in suspension from all ninja business for a year. Do I make myself clear?" Anger was building up in side of me. She knew me so well- and knew what to threaten me with my only other joy ...
My job, it keeps me sane and also keeps me busy.

But my emotions got the better of me and I blew a gasket.

"HOW CAN YOU NOT EXPECT ME TO LOOK FOR HIM HE IS MY TEACHER!! I WANT HIM HOME WITH US AGAIN!!!" I screamed my face turing red and my throat hurting. Naruto grabbed me by the arm shaking me saying words of calm but they had not affect on me I was beyond redemption. I had spoken out against the hokage. With such disrespect and contemt too. I was instantly ashamed.

"Calm down" Tsunade commanded. I looked at her my eyes stinging notifying me that I'm about to cry. I almost saw a flash of compassion in her eyes but they soon went steely cold again. I have to assume that she knows more about the situation in the land of snow than I do. I have to imagine the there are talks between cultural and economic leaders going on beyond closed doors that had factors at play beyond a jonin Dr's pay grade.