Aret
I have almost no recollection of my parents. I really only have memories or flashes of a blond woman and a very large solid square dark man. I believe my father was a hunter or trapper and my mom must have traveled with him on hi routes.
Why members of our village didn't take care of me was probably because mom wasn't local, though dad was. The villagers weren't cruel only indifferent. They needed to take care of their own families first.
I was on my own; I must have been wild for a while before Gran took me in. She was just an old lady. Maybe she was lonely, to take on a wild child at her stage of life. Maybe she was hoping I would take over her midwifing when she passed on. I couldn't do that to assist in child birth takes more than I have to give. I have almost no people skills. I prefer animals, the chickens, rabbits and goats are where m skills lie. I relate better with things that are not like me.
I don't know my age I think I'm probably 23, maybe older, I don't really know. I'm very small, not malformed just tiny. I matured slowly, probably due to malnutrition early in life.
Gran was able to civilize me. I can hold conversations with the villagers when they come to buy my eggs, goat milk and butter, or buy their own breeding stock when needed. Otherwise I mind my own business.
Gran has been gone 5 or 6 years now. She made me understand I need people to survive. I guess that was the hardest part for her in raising me. I still don't let people in; I'm constantly looking for someone's real reasons for interactions with me. I observe people more than I interact with them.
I guess it was about 4 years ago when I took in Sarn and Bren. They were orphans a couple of years younger than I, young men really. I couldn't see them living on the street like I did. Sarn is very serious he has taken on an apprenticeship with the Blacksmith a stern fellow, called Red, because he always seems over heated and more likely it's the long red beard.
Bren is more fun loving and appears undecided on what he's going to be doing later in life. He has been working at the Dusk Inn. Particularly in the stables and assisting the aging proprietor at the inn. He never fails to make me smile.
My life changed when Sarn and Bren came here to live. I have reasons to smile I never had before. Lately though the atmosphere has changed, there is some sort of tension between the boys I don't understand. Probably just the tension of too many adults in one household, I hope it's nothing serious.
One of these days they'll leave me, to carry on their lives, really I'm not helpless I have the chickens and goats to sustain me, the proceeds from them will support me in a fashion. I will always be able to raise more chickens if I need to, but I'm still apprenshive. The boys won't be here, not that anyone has paid me much attention in my little corner of our village. I am not afraid to be alone but loneliness might kill me.
I don't associate much with the other villagers, I am seen as foreign, everyone here is tall and dark whereas I'm small and lighter I think this has a lot to do with them not accepting me when I was young. I just didn't seem like I was one of them. The women here don't seem to want to associate with me, while their husbands and sons give me strange looks like I'm going to change into a bird and fly away. It's very disconcerting.
Going to the village with a cart of chickens, eggs and fresh cheese might not seem like a big deal to most. Its daunting, a big undertaking for me. Crating the chickens, assembling the eggs safely, wrapping the cheeses for easy sale takes time and patience. Often I don't know the reception I'll receive; sometimes I have an easy time dealing with the half grown girls on behalf of their mothers. Apparently they aren't as critical as the older versions, probably because I've always been here for them, whereas their mothers still see me as foreign.
When I come to the village proper I always bring food to Sarn and Bren. Often staying and sharing the meal with them. Sarn is always happy to spend some time in the middle of the day with me. _ Bren is ecstatic when I come to see him, so happy it makes me happy.
We usually meet at the stall where I display the cheeses, but today I stopped by the smithy because I was having an especially good day. Having already sold the cheese, eggs and most of the younger hens I brought today.
I approached the open shed where Sarn is usually to be found. "Hello." I call out. Red is present and turns when I speak. I take a small step back feeling confronted by such a gruff man. His holding a gigantic hammer and tongs made him seen even more imposing, plus it is quite hot and close. The sheer size of Red is scary, although I have never gotten the sense he is dangerous but definitely overwhelming.
"Mm, Aret, Sarn is out running an errand, can I help you with anything? Your welcome to wait, you can keep me company until my apprentice returns." Red says as he puts up his tools and removes his gloves. He sort of leans back against the anvil. Suddenly I notice how big this man actually is, one of his hands will cover the width of my body. I'm brought back to reality. The world is not built to my scale.
I stumble over a couple of sentences that really saying nothing other than I'm uncomfortable around people. I'm trying my best to not sound like a simpleton. I ask Red if he'd like to share our lunch. "I'd like very much to have lunch with you Aret." Red replies, "But I've had lunch with Sarn. His manners need a little refining for my taste."
Sarn comes back in time to save me from Red. "Have you been here long Aret?" Sarn asks. Turning to Red, Sarn asks "Having a good time were you?" His voice seems very acidic, which seems out of character. Leaving me a little puzzled. The men talk shop for a few minutes. I notice possibly for the first time, both of these men are essentially equal in height and size, when did Sarn grow so much. Well, he is training to be a blacksmith he was bound to conform to the physical requirements of the job. I attempt to return to my cart. "When you're ready for lunch Sarn we will go retrieve Bren and have our lunch in the square."
I overhear a strange comment Red made as I exit the shed. "You had better hurry, don't think everyone has your patience." I'm a little lost with this statement, not knowing the intent. I let it pass thinking v this was a work related comment.
"Be right with you Aret, I just have to straighten something out with Red here before I'm ready to go." Sarn informs me as I glance back before I pass through the shed door. I hear them talking for a few minutes before Sarn appears ready to leave.
Sarn climbs into the seat beside me and takes the reins which he normally doesn't. I'm happy to let him drive, he slides exceedingly close. I don't know what to think of his sudden nearness. The smoke, metal and male sweat scent suddenly assail me. I'm slightly dizzy, my senses overwhelmed. Sliding over just a little I put my hands on either side bracing on the bench. I lower my head with my eyes closed trying to clear my head. I feel Sarn turn slightly, feeling his exhalation as it passes my neck. He shifts the reins to his left hand and places his right hand on the small of my back.
My his, hands are as big as Reds, runs through my thoughts. Why this should bother me I don't know. _ "Are you alright Aret," he asks me.
"Just a little dizzy." I reply. "I have a lot of things I want to talk to you and Bren about that have been on my mind lately. Maybe we can talk tonight when you come home."
"Ok, later then. We are here anyway, want me to get him." Meaning we have arrived at the Dusk Inn where Bren has been working.
"No, let me surprise him." I state, as I climb out of the cart.
When I reach the stable doors where I suspect Bren might be working, no sooner than I can blink I am scooped up and spun, this is our usually greeting. I let out a little squeak, to my embarrassment. Bren put me down, I beg several different times. He finally relents when he sees Sarn coming through the double stable doors. He lets me slide slowly down his body until I am finally on the ground. I regain my composure and step back just as the other half of what seems like a ritual greeting occurs, because it always happens when Sarn witnesses Bren greeting me. Somehow Sarn always appears just as Bren sets me down. Sarn furls his brow and palm out pushes his brothers' right shoulder until Bren is shoved back a step. Then Bren repeats the same to Sarn. Greeting done. Now everyone is friendly again. This has been going on for a couple of years it feels like a "brothers thing" to me.
Bren says to me "How's my little Aret?" Turning his attention to me, he almost completely ignores that his brother is there. Bren has always been very affectionate with me, really way too much to be proper, but really I've never had the nerve to tell him to stop. Really what other human interactions do I have other than with him and Sarn. Do I really want to cut myself off from all human touch? I tell him I'm good and that I've already sold my wares and want to have lunch at the village square with him and Sarn.
We have a pleasant lunch, not really discussing much, but talking a lot. Mostly giggling on my part, Bren's sense of humor always gets me going. I take my leave of the boys after our lunch to head home and plan the things I want to talk to them about later.
I'm mulling over what I want to say to Sarn and Bren during our discussion at dinner. I don't think I have the right words. Maybe not even the right vocabulary for this talk. This is very important I don't want to mess up and cause any bad feelings between us. I keep busy with small tasks while waiting for them to come home.
Sarn arrives first, greeting me with a small smile. Dinner will be ready shortly I announce from the kitchen. I listen to the sounds he makes as he washes up from work. These small slices of family times are precious as they are becoming unlikely to continue because grown men usually move away and start families. This is the precise subject we will be approaching tonight. At the very least I'll try to bring the topic up but knowing Sarn and Bren they may not let any sort of serious conversations happen. They like to evade these kinds of talks at least with me. Although I've heard them have long conversations with each other, in very serious tones sometimes they even argue a bit. But they never tell me what they are disputing even when I ask.
Sarn will tell me it wasn't anything important. They both insist it's not serious even when I ask why they are arguing. Needless to say I'm nervous to bring up the subject, but they need to start thinking about their futures beyond going to work and eating dinner. So I think I'll just jump right into it when we start our meal. Sarn almost always speaks for the two of them when we have serious discussions. I think they have decided for him to speak to streamline these talks, or because maybe they are uncomfortable having them. _ Bren comes home while I'm setting out our plates and utensils. I don't call out to him; I can hear them start discussing something. I just continue to prepare our dinner.
I'm putting food on the table when they walk in, like a force of nature talking about work and the things that happened that day. I sit and ask them about their day. _ I listen to a few stories. I interject with, "I heard something while in the village today. A couple of the young women were talking about a woman in Fairfax township who is running a service where she introduces men and women who are marriage minded to each other. Would either of you two be interested?" I wait for an answer for what seems like a long time. I look up and Bren has stopped eating, his mouth hanging open. Sarn seems stunned as well but seems to be formulating a response.
"Well since you brought it up Aret. We are in nogiations." He waves his hand between himself and Bren. Like they are in nogiations between them, but surely this has been something they have been thinking about as well, maybe I've been worrying for nothing. "As soon as we come to a conclusion we promise, you will be the first to know." Sarn continues.
They both kind of look at me strangely for a couple of minutes as if I've asked them to fly to town to bring me golden chicken eggs or something crazy. We start eating again and I ask if I have made them uncomfortable. I look at Sarn because he normally speaks for the both of them when Bren seems to lose his ability to communicate. I am surprised when Bren asks me candidly, "Aret, are you considering this?" Clearly I've hit a nerve with Bren.
"No, I would not take well to a stranger. Goodness, why would you think that. I'm only thinking that maybe the eligible young ladies here in the village aren't what you and Sarn might be looking for. There doesn't seem to be any evidence that you're interested in anyone here. There are many other places you can find agreeable young women, maybe just expand your opportunities." Well that came out better than I thought it would, I think, taking a cleansing breathe.
"No, no one is going to make any decision like that for me. Definitely, I can find my own wife or partner or whatever." Bren is fierce on this subject. "I don't want to hear anything else on this subject." He declares and starts eating again glaring at me as if I just told him to get out, I don't want you here.
"Bren, don't get so worked up it's not as if Aret knows our plans. We haven't had any discussion with her so calm down. But," he turns to me and says, "We are going to have a very in-depth conversation soon with you Aret. There are a lot of things we need you to understand about the way we feel."
"And, I actually have a little news." Sarn adds. Red is finally going to Fairfax to meet that lady he has been betrothed to since before I became his apprentice. Do you believe it, that old bachelor might actually be ready to marry. I don't think he could wait much longer, them being betrothed all those years. I guess the family is pressuring him." Sarns blurts between mouthfuls, Red was right his manners do needs some help.
"He will be gone next week. I'll need to stay at the smithy a few days while he is gone. I hope that won't cause any problems with you Aret. Bren will be here with you so I know you'll be ok. I don't know how I feel about it, it bothers me anyway." Sarns facial expression seems pensive. I think he's more nervous about being fully in charge of the smithy, than leaving me in the hands of his brother.
Dinner finishes up in a better mood than it started, Bren helps me clean the dishes, and he kisses me on my forehead and quietly tells me he loves me before turning in for the night, like he has done since they came to here to live. He's sweet. I'll need to speak to him about how it's kind of wrong for him to be touching me and any sort of kissing especially in light of the news they have shared tonight. He puts his hand on my lower back as he walks by; yeah I'm going to miss him being around. He makes me feel needed.
I call out goodnight to them as I get ready for bed. _ Tonight especially, I wonder what I'm missing out on not having a husband. What would it be like to have a warm body next to me every night? To experience relations, possibly even have a child. Well it seems I'll never find out. I'll get to see how Sarn and Bren's families grow anyway. That will have to be enough. Possibly their children might call me auntie. I guess that really would have more to do with how their wives feel about me. I hope they'll let me be part of their lives in a small way.
Aret, stop dreaming up complications. You don't even know if they'll stay in our village after they find partners, I tell myself. _ I drift off to sleep where both Sarn and Bren figure prominently in my dreams. I know I dreamt of them but can't remember any one dream clearly.
The next few days pass, one task blends into another. I'm a little depressed with the thought of Sarn and Bren not being around.
Bren comes home first tonight. When I see him my chest feels a little strange. I watch him as he comes in. Tonight he doesn't rush at me. He walks over slowly and picks me up for a little twirl. He hugs me a little more than normal he lets me slide down his long lean body so that our faces are level. "It's good to be home with you Aret." I get the feeling he might mean something other than his words say.
Sarn arrives home in the middle of that tender moment. He glares at Bren. Bren lets me slide the rest of the way to the floor. I move quickly out of the way. Thinking they are going to have their ritual shoving match. Its seems something is different tonight. They just touch each other's shoulders in greeting. Well maybe whatever has been causing strife between them has been settled. Possibly the fact that they are both grown men, and they shouldn't be squabbling like small boys. Maybe just the fact that they won't be living together forever, has settled whatever it was that caused the daily standoff. _ whatever it was, I do like the no aggression thing, before dinner.
We settle into our evening routines quickly, dinner then dishes, Bren sometimes reads to us while we sit in the living room in front of the fire. Tonight I'm cuddled with Sarn at the other end of the sofa. Bren is in the arm chair reading from the book the borrowed from Mr. Duskin the elderly man that owns the Dusk Inn. My feet are pressed against Sarns right leg, trying to absorb his warmth through the bottom of my feet. He reaches under the quilt and starts rubbing my foot through my socks. I make a little pleasurable moan and Bren stops reading and looks over at us with a suspicious look on his face.
"Are you listening to me tonight?" Bren asks. Sarn says he should go ahead because he didn't mean to interrupt but her feet were cold through her socks and just wanted to warm them. I snuggle my feet into his big warm hands and close my eyes listening to Bren read.
I must have fallen asleep because, I wake up as Sarn is covering me with a blanket in my room. I softly thank him for bringing me to bed. I don't think he's been in my room in over a year. I sink into my covers slowly and quietly mumble "I love you", as I fall back asleep. I don't hear if he says anything because I'm already falling asleep again.
I wake with a start the next morning. I panic a little hoping I didn't actually tell Sarn I loved him last night. I can't believe I said such a foolish thing. Maybe he didn't hear. Maybe he will believe it's the silly mutterings of a sleepy silly girl.
After breakfast I determine that Sarn didn't hear me last night because he didn't say or do anything out of the ordinary over breakfast. I'm probably okay, no more sentimental crap. They can't and don't need to be dependent on me for anything anymore. Time to break myself from them. They aren't mine to keep or lean on anymore.
Tonight Sarn will start his three days away, staying at the smithy. I asked him several times why he needs to stay there while Red is away. Eventually he says it's because Red asked him to. I personally don't understand why Red would need him to stay there, but he obviously had reasons.
My day proceeds along normally, nothing really happening. What can possibly change with hungry goats and broody chickens? The rabbits don't really cause much of a ruckus other than trying to chew their way out of another enclosure.
I'm left on my own for the whole day trying to figure out what just Bren and I will talk about tonight.
Lately there has been a new kind of tension between us. I think it might be because of my having suggested the matchmaker's services in the first place. It has been almost a week and they haven't told me anything new about their plans or negotiations. Maybe I should bring it up, but how without making him further upset with me. Sarn doesn't seem as annoyed with me about this but his emotions are harder to read. Being he is so serious all the time.
Bren gets home a little earlier than normal today. Dinner is not quite ready yet. I call to him to tell him so, but I suddenly realize he is standing behind me and clamp down on my volume mid-sentence. I turn and am enveloped by Bren's arms, he hasn't yet washed up from the stables and smells of horse and hay mixed with his own particular scent which seems to roll off of him and burrow into my senses. There is no little spin tonight so I'm spared the embarrassment of my involuntary squeals.
He holds me for a particularly long time; he seems to be savoring holding me. "Bren, are you going to let me go." I inquire.
His response is slow in coming as is his release of me. "No, I don't think I will. We are finally alone and I need you to finally understand how I feel about you." But he relents and lets me slide slowly to the ground. His arms although don't leave my body he is still holding me.
I suddenly I think there is way more going on and I really don't know what to think. It seems a little too sensual to actually be happening. "Bren what do you think you are doing? Stop." I give him a little push to separate us. I am confused by his closeness and unwillingness to back off. I don't understand what he thinks he's doing.
"Aret, I'm going to clean up. We have a lot to talk about." He says, but his hands have moved up to the back of my ne
"That's good, because you aren't behaving yourself can't help but wonder, what has gotten into him. As he leaves the room I notice how my heart is racing and I feel very hot and my stomach is slightly off. I sit down and try to compose myself; I can hear him in the other room washing up. How am I going to survive being in this house with him alone for three days, if he makes me react this way. All I can think is I hoping he finishes up his talks and commences with the arrangements with his young lady soon. I can't take a lot of this.
After our meal we go into the main room and sit on the couch. Bren says "Come and sit with me on the sofa, I need to be close to you to tonight. No reason to stay way over on the other end of the couch." So I slide closer and he wraps the quilt around us after he stokes the fire.
He doesn't pick up his book like I expect him to but wraps his arms around me. Gathering me into his lap, my head is resting against his chest. I hear his even breaths and the thumping of his heart. His face is in my hair. Bren has always been a little to snuggly with me, I want to tell him not to be so familiar but then he has been my only form of human contact for so long that
The thought of not being able to hug him or snuggle up with him during the evening. So I let it go on though it really shouldn't.
"Aret, it's time we finished hashing out our issues. Sarn and I have come to an agreement now we need too as well. If he hadn't of come around soon we might have come to blows again." Bren relates almost as a joke.
He lifts my chin with his hand. Looking into my eyes, he says "This can't really be that much of a surprise to you. But Sarn and I have been talking about you."
_ "Wait, what are you talking about?" I'm confused again.
"Listen, Aret I'm telling you I want to be with you. Do you understand what I'm saying? I have been making plans and you are a big part of them. Without you my plans aren't necessary." Looking into Bren eyes is an experience I want to prolong. He can't be serious. He doesn't seem to be joking.
"Are you serious Bren, you want to stay here with me?"
"Yes Aret, that is what I've been saying, I need to be with you. Tonight if possible but I can wait if I have to. Will you let me show you how much I love you and how much I have needed to be with you for a long time?" I feel I'm good at reading expressions but Bren's is more like I've served him potpie on coldest night of the year, he's ready to devour me. I have butterflies in my stomach and I'm scared at the same time.
"What will the other villagers think if we suddenly become a couple after all this time?" I randomly worry out loud.
"Aret, most of the village thinks we already are, I made it known you were off the market for any of the other village men, so none came courting. It's good to have a brother who's the biggest man in the town, to back you up; nobody wants to argue with Sarn." Bren explains so matter of fact, like any of this is normal. Well maybe it is for him, his life hasn't exactly been normal. He and Sarn we orphaned in their formative years and being shunted around until being raised by a girl barely older than they were is probably the strangest kind of upbringing I can think of.
During our little talk Bren has moved his hands around the back of my neck and untied the thong holding my hair back. He is loosening the thick braid I keep it in. Bren seems to enjoy running his fingers through my thick wavy hair.
It has fallen around my face now, he pushes it back and comes in closer, and I think he's going to kiss me. Not one of those pecks on the top of my head he sometimes bestows, but a real one. Yes, warm, soft, slightly moist I tilt my head to the side like I've seen done before; this is so right, his mouth is delicious and tongue dazzling playing with mine just a little. The kiss becomes more intense, his tongue inside my mouth seeming to spar with mine.
Pulling me closer. I can feel his lean body pressing lightly on my own. "Bren" I manage to gasp, please slow down I don't know if I'm ready for this.
_ "Aret, is do you have other prospects, I'm right here. I want you and I think you knew that somewhere deep down. If you honestly think there is anyone else let me know now because I intend for everyone to know were together. All the whispering old ladies will stop. They keep wondering which one of us will match you."
"Which one of you?" I ask. _ "Yes Sarn or me, we have been the whisper of the village long enough. I think they are waiting to see when your belly starts to grow and which one of us will stand up." Bren says almost smiling.
"Oh. But it's not like that."
"Yes, but they don't know that." Bren interjects. "Back to why we are having this little conversation. Are you willing to join with me? Even if you are there are some things that are must definite stipulations. But well get to those later." He says running his fingers in my hair and lightly down my neck, I think he's trying to persuade me with his ability to make me forget everything around us. Which is why my protests about his too familiar handling of me, in public always go unheeded.
"Bren, I love you and of course I want you here with me but when did you decide you wanted more from me. I always thought that you saw me as a sister or something?" I'm thoughtful but he's busy caressing the back of my arms.
"Aret, you have never been my sister. You have always been the woman I would someday be with for me". He's now pulling me slightly, bringing me in closer. He's coming in for a kiss I think but he moves to the side and starts with small nibbles and noises at my neck.
I absolutely have never felt these little electric jolts running down my back before. I feel a delicious tightening of muscles and a peculiar hot and needy ache.
"Aret I need you tonight, I have been waiting for so long." Bren stands up and scoops me off the couch. He moves to the floor in front of us and sets me down amidst the rug and the quilt we were wrapped in. I sit on the rug as Bren slowly moves to hover over me.
Wait I'm still confused Bren. You mean for you and me to be a couple? Why now?
One, because were alone. Two, I have been waiting a long time and Three, Sarn and I have finally come to an agreement. Enough questions we have forever for your questions and your teasing will come to an end tonight.
"Why all the secrecy? You could have of stated your intentions years ago. What negotiations were needed for me? Not like you're going to get a dowry or three pigs, this is all I have. What teasing?
I know, he says lowering himself, coming closer. I lean back to maintain the distance between us and soon find myself laying on the rug, looking up at him. Bren's scent and heat hit me like a force. He makes a line of kisses and nibbles from my mouth to my neck, particularly spending time at the hollow at my collar bone. His legs have pushed my clothes up, bunching them between my legs.
Please Aret, he almost begs. We will cuddle, pet and talk the night away. Just let me in tonight. He slides one hand up my thigh pushing the material of my dress higher.
Suddenly I'm regretting never telling Bren to behave. Maybe I don't want him to. Help me with this how do I get you out of this, Bren asks, talking about my dress I believe.
He starts untying the strings holding my dress together. Pushing it off my shoulder. Let me see you Aret. Never mind, I will go first and he starts to take his shirt off.
I look at anything but him thinking I shouldn't look. I've never seen him like this before, stripped down.
Aret, Look at me he says. Really look now. I'm not a child anymore; I'm a man that wants to be with you. I'm here and serious. While I was staring at the floor he had continued to undress. He is now almost completely nude. He is definitely a man, but I already knew this, then why am I so nervous. Long lean well-muscled chest, I reach out to touch him instinctively. I pull my hand back; he catches it and brings it back to his chest. Go ahead feel me Aret. He grabs my other hand and guides it down towards his stomach, pressing it slightly while closing he eyes. There is nothing wrong, and no shame in exploring each other. I caress him; he is hard and slightly damp. Altogether an exhilarating mixture. I move in closer wanting to press myself to this new found wonderment that is his body. I find him intoxicating. Pressed against him I'm in another universe of feeling, I'm breathing heavy, my heat is racing. Suddenly I have too many clothes in my way to feel all I want to feel.
Bren is now helping me to remove my dress. I'm in my under clothes only. I don't think anyone has ever seen me like this. I'm trembling; I don't know what to do.
Bren's hands are now behind me clutching me close, pressing himself into me. I feel him move. But I'm slightly shocked by the movement; his hands are wrapped around behind me. Suddenly I realize where the movement is coming from.
I push him back and look down. Go ahead you can feel that too, Bren insists. I reach down and feel for the movement, I find him hard and so much larger than I expected. "Oh, my." I exclaim. I am rewarded by it flexing
