Christmas At the West House.

"I Guess, I love not knowing."

Previously....

Right away, he saw her slender silhouette walk out of the back room. He just froze in place as he watched her struggle with putting on her black apron. For some reason, he found her to be absolutely sexy in her Jitters apron. There was just something about how it hugged her lean frame that he couldn't get over.

Really, it was amazing how often he still got mesmerized by her beauty.

"Haaaaryyy, is it?" The sound of a slightly familiar voice broke him out of the trance he so clearly was in.

"I Guess, I love not knowing."

Barry turned to see a tall brunette smiling at him. "You're Iris' friend right?"

Barry looked confused.

"Sorry, where are my manners? I'm Kendra. Kendra Saunders. We're coworkers; Iris and I." The brunette extends her hand with the widest smile plastered on her face.

Worried that she might have noticed him obviously checking Iris out, he nervously shakes her hand "Nice to meet you. And... it's actually Barry." He lets outs a nervous chuckle.

"Oh! I'm so sorry," she apologizes, "Barry. Got it!" She paused for a second before offering. "Would you like me to let Iris know you're out here? It's Saturday, which is basically our slowest day of the week. I'm sure she can spare a few minutes." She kindly proposes.

Barry struggled to find a possible excuse as to why he could have been loitering outside of Jitters.

"Or ... you could come back in a couple of hours. She's in charge of closing shop today." Kendra suggests clearly noting his uncomfortable countenance.

Of course Barry knew that. Before the coma, he usually stopped by after work to help her close shop. Sometimes, he would make sure to finish his lab work early just so he could stop by Jitters .

Still unsure and nervous, Barry responds. "I'll probably just stop by later then. Thanks."

"No problem! I'm gotta get back but, it was really nice meeting you, Barry." Kendra smiles as she opens the door and slides into Jitters.

Fast forward 2hrs later, here he was.

Feet dangling off the edge of the roof as he watched all the cars in the parking lot slowly drift off to blend into the night traffic; except for one.

As he got up, he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He took it out just to see a text from Cisco which read,

"God speed brother, or dare I say, Flash speed... doesn't matter. YOU'VE GOT THIS BRO!"

Barry shoved the phone back in his pocket. He knew Cisco's intentions were purely good but honestly, the text only added to his nerves. It just reminded him that he was keeping this huge secret from her. He felt bad for blatantly looking her in the eye and lying to her face the night she made him promise he wasn't and wouldn't keep anymore secrets from her.

"Keeping my Flash identity from her keeps her safe." This was the mantra he constantly repeated to stop himself from telling her. He would repeated the mantra several times until he completely convinced himself it was true. The truth of cause was he didn't want to think about what he would do if she was ever in danger. The truth? It was more about his sanity than it was about her safety.

In a flash, he was back at the entrance of Jitters. He peeked in just to find Iris struggling to carry a huge tray of what looked like pastries, to the back room.

He decides to count down. As a kid, he used this method numerous time. It helped him make hard decisions and do scary things without pondering too hard on them. In a way, it was like ripping off a bandaid. He shut his eyes and began whispering, "five, four, three, two o-"