How do I start this? I suppose I could lie to you, but that's no way to start an introduction, especially to someone you just met. I could lie to you, I'm sure I could, but it wouldn't be as much of a lie towards you, but more towards myself.
When I was alive, and healthy, I used to tell anyone who asked that I was fine, but it was clear I was not. I wasn't just claiming I was fine. I was trying to convince myself that I was fine. But in all reality I wasn't. I spent a great deal of my life convincing myself I was fine, then simply being fine.
I should probably explain to you what happened. I died. Seven years ago I was diagnosed with cancer, and just recently I was given a year to live. That's a lot to handle for a nineteen year old. It's harder to say, then it is to believe.
That's a lot to let sink in. I understand that. Feel free to give yourself some time to let it all in. Just take a deep breath or two.
You ready? Well I guess I'd understand if you didn't read on. I really couldn't blame you at all. But if you truly are curious try to stay with me. Ready or not, here it come's the story of my life. Well more like, the story of the ending of my life.
Here we go.
