Terrible Fanfiction Writings

Five Chapter

"Thx guys for reading this book. I am glad it is liked. I am making Dip say this because I am the All Powerful Author lololol." Dip said.
Dipper was standing on the street right next to the post office. He was mailing a letter that was going to be sent to his parents.
Meanwhile, Wendy was enjoying her cabbage in the woods.
"Yay cabbage." She shouted.
Suddenly, Finn from Adventure Time showed up.
"Mathematical." He declared while snatching up the cabbage. He then left.
"Noooo!!! Wait, why is he even here? That makes no sense!" Wendy shouted.
"Because the All Powerful Author really likes Adventure Time and wanted to insert it into the story!" Finn briefly reappeared to convey that random fact.
"Ah. Ok cool." Wendy said.
But she mourned the loss of her cabbage.
Anyway, back to our hero Dip.
Dip was just about to mail the letter to his parents when suddenly:
"GRAB!"
A green, Shrek-like figure stole the letter from Dippr's hands!!!!!!!!!!
Dippre gasped.
"Are you Shrek????"
"Nope. I'm Jim. I just happen to look exactly like him."
Jim was exactly like Shrek- but he had a Canadian accent instead of a Scottish one.
Jim proceeded to tear open Dip's letter and read it aloud.
"'Dear Mom and Dad,
I know not why thou hast sent us to the dangerous Gravity Falls!
If ye are a wand'ring traveler, it shall be best for ye to tarry not and be on ye way!
If ye are a brave hearted adventurer, however, ye shall stay for the terror and beasts that await ye!
Why thou hast sent thine own young offspring here, I shall never know.
Did thou know not of the danger that lurked here! I fear thou hast been careless in sending thine own offspring here! I assume thou hast never been here thyself, or thou may not have sent us to this place!
Though, do not assume that I despise it here! No, that is far from the truth! I am rather enjoying my time here indeed.
Well, I suppose I must depart!
I shall see thee another time.
Do not tarry in writing back!
-Dipper'"
Jim stared at Dipper.
"...I do not know how to respond to that. Well... Bye..."
Jim awkwardly danced away.
What exciting adventures will come next for the surprisingly good with words Daipper and his friends?!?!? Find out NEXXXXXXXXT TIMMMMMMMMMMMNMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
A/N: I tried to do the Old English right and I hope I did. If not OH WELL