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Chapter One : Lainey

I guess I can't say this was the first time I'd met Ezra. I mean, I knew of him, although I'd never really spoken to him legitimately. When I first transferred, three years ago, he was all the rage. I was fourteen and he was twenty-one. It had been his first year as well, and he'd already had all the girls wrapped around his finger. 

 

I think I wasn't as bad last year because I only needed a helper sometimes, and they didn't have to worry about me in every class. But this year? Oh, no. At first, I think it was because Remy left. She was getting married, at considering the fact she was thirty-six, I figured it was about time. 

 

So, as I sat in class on the first day of the semester, why was I left with such a big knot in my stomach? Oh, wait, I knew exactly why.

 

Getting married meant moving on. Moving on meant moving away. Moving away meant leaving, which meant she was leaving me. I was so tired of being left behind.

 

 I stared down at my schedule, completely ignoring what my Literature II teacher was saying. Ezra Greenwood was listed as my counselor, so why wasn't he here?

 

Personally, I was rather glad that he wasn't here. I hadn't spoken a word to him since my dork days of acne, greasy hair, and dorky glasses. I actually thought he'd liked me for a while, but then he began to ignore me for the more "popular" girls. 

 

It was for the best. Everyone left me behind at some point or another. It was just part of life.

 

"Miss Faith, would you mind reading first for us?"

 

I looked at my copy of The Outsiders, then I looked back at her. I was on the correct page and everything, but no words came out of my mouth.

 

I wasn't really sure what it was that made me go mute sometimes. I guess sometimes when people treat me a certain way or if I'm feeling crappy, my brain just shuts down. I can't really help it. It's not like I choose to sit there and stare at my teachers like a dumb ass.

 

They don't see it that way. They think I'm some sort of idiot, that I can't think or speak for myself. Maybe they're right. Sometimes I'm not so sure about myself.

 

Either way, I look like an idiot. I think everyone else thinks I'm an idiot, too, because I catch a few of the other kids rolling their eyes and shaking their heads. I don't know why, but I feel like I'm about to cry. It might be because I'm frustrated or it might be because I'm starting to feel like I really am dumb like everyone thinks.

 

"Miss Faith?" Mrs. Dare looks weary of me already and begins to scan the room for someone else to call on. "Okay, let's try you, love," she says, motioning towards Elizabeth Hood.

 

Elizabeth begins reading hesitantly, shooting me a sideways glance. There's pity in her eyes, and it really just makes me feel even worse.

 

 "Miss Faith, please sit down," Mrs. Dare says before I even processed what I was doing.

 

I blink three times in a row before I realized I'm no longer sitting at my desk. Instead, I am walking towards the door.