Currents Convulsive (Vic Fuentes fanfiction)

As I awake on the lonely cold December morning, all I can feel is sadness. The only thing I feel besides being numb is sorrow. I was so tired. So emotionally and physically drained. All I wanted was to sleep for eternity. Its so hard to talk when you want to kill yourself, it hurts to even open your mouth and let words flow out without the fear of someone judging you for your stupidity.

"Amy get up and start getting ready for school!!" I hear my mother yell. I let out a long song sigh and walk over to my closet. I pick out a oversized gray sweater, black jeans, and my old beat up vans. I run my straightener through the wavy pieces and apply a thick line of liquid eyeliner and many coats of mascara. Who am I even trying to impress anyways? I grab my textbooks, say goodbye to my mother and start to walk to the bus stop. I shove my headphones into my ears and put on Dreamer's Disease by letlive, raising the volume higher than usual because I absolutely do not want to deal with this bullshit today.

I walk onto the bus and through the aisles, trying to find a seat. I feel my heart rate quicken and my breathes get shorter. I can feel everyone staring at me, oh the paranoia will be the death of me.

After 7 horrendous classes I arrive home, not like I wanted to be there either. I don't want to be anywhere anymore. I hate school, and I hate being home. I just want to go somewhere new I'm tired of the same shit everyday. I open my laptop and check tumblr noticing I have over 20 messages. That's bizarre. I click on the message box and my heart drops as I read the messages. All sickening mean things.

"You stupid bitch"

"Die"

"Kill yourself already"

"everyone hates you"

Hundreds, maybe even thousands of tears fall down my face. How could someone be so nasty and hateful? I slam my laptop shut and pace my bedroom floor, sobbing.

Tonight is the right. I have been through enough. I try to think of the least painful way, and it hits me. I run to my medicine cabinet and almost grinning as I find the ibuprofen. I pour at least 15 capsules onto my hand and swallow the whole handful. I run back into my bedroom and lay down in bed, hoping I would never wake up.