Heathens

1.1

I punched the wall repeatedly. My knuckles were bruised. I had cuts and burns. Whatever I can to not feel. I have no idea where she is again. Not only that but I fucked up badly with her. Everyone banged on the door, but no one would knock it down. As much as they wanted to see if I was fine, they refused to actually check. It has been a week. All I've done was drink, hurt myself, and workout.

"Kyle!" Jess yelled and I grabbed the nearest fragile thing, threw it at the door. Jess kicked the door and screamed. I heard footsteps outside but didn't check. Instead I went to my room and ignored everyone.

The room was rather warm so I took off my shirt. I looked at the ceiling and I just wanted to stay here forever. I didn't really sleep, I refused to sleep.

"Kyle. Please, you're scaring us." Adrian called out but I got up to shut my room door. It won't help but it just made it feel like home. Except it wasn't home. She was my home, not even my sister was. I lost my home only because of my stupid ways. I have no idea how they could disappear like that. It frustrates me a lot and I can't help but feel more small than I am to this world.

Now the room was hot and so I grabbed my shirt. Walked right out of my apartment and went to the actual, working showers. Everyone stared, I mean like everyone outside. Which was most people, which was about 50. I'm pretty sure I looked like shit so I just.. I need to feel normal.

Working showers had a line up, but the male line was shorter and so it went by fast before I was in a shower. Some girls checked me out and I winked at them. I have no idea why I'm doing this. I let the cool water hit my back as I flinched at how this felt on my knuckles. They were sore and I broke my left hand.

I heard a few showers turn off and heard footsteps. I kind of got scared but I decided to let go of that fear.

"Hey man, did you hear about General and his wife? He's dead and his brother in law went crazy. Sheesh, imagine that." One spoke.

"Yeah man, but I'd still hit her widowed ass up. She's fine as fúck!" The other spoke and I felt a little anger.

"It's not like she even loved him. They hated each other, heard them speaking how the deal was off but back on when her brother came back. I wonder what that is about." First one said, and I turned off the water, grabbing my towel. I wrapped it around my body and walked out. Alec and Adrian were there staring at me. Alec smiled and Adrian sighed.

"Told you it'd work." Alec said and looked back, wetting his toothbrush then putting toothpaste on it.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah... Whatever mate." Adrian said, looking at him. He rolled his eyes and fixed his gaze back to me. He had his arms crossed as Alec looked at me through the mirror.

"We need you man. We need the Cap back... Me being Cap doesn't feel right." He smiled weakly then looked to the ground.

"Sorry but I'm not going back out." I said and went to the mirror, opening it to grab a new toothbrush. I pushed passed Adrian and wet it. Alec handed me his toothpaste, while I put some one and wet my brush again. Then started to brush.

"I mean, I see why. You don't even have big feet, small parts... Hey, that's your new nickname. Small Parts, if you have that then that must mean you don't even have balls. You don't have the balls to do it, Small Parts." Alec said as he spit out the paste and smiled at me. He kept going on about my parts while I just ignored him. That's when Hale came in and shook his head.

"Listen... Walker. We need you. I need you. She... Now she really needs you." He said  and lattes my shoulder. I found it amusing how I was the youngest one. It's like something out of a gay man's fantasy. Three attractive men about to do their gay thing. Except we all may be half naked, except Hale, but we're all mostly straight. Besides Alec and Adrian who are probably messing around since you can't even find them without another.

"What's in it for me?" I asked and they smirked.

"I thought you'd never ask." Hale said, got on one knee. Please don't tell me it's a blowjob.

"No homo." He said and pulled out something from his boot. He got up and smiled.

"I got down on my knees for you... Kidding, sort of but here." He gave me a paper and I looked at it while leaning back on the counter.

"No need to kill... This mood but we've been in here for so long most probably think we're gay or something. No homo Adrian." Alec spike really fast before laughing and winked at Adrian. I just looked between the two and rolled my eyes. The paper was a black and white pic of a open folder of Paige and Eric.

"I found this in your sisters... Office. I was just doing my.. job?" He said and took it back.

"I know where that is." I said and he nodded.

"Everyone does, but only we-" he pointed to us, and behind him.

"Are going." He took a deep breath. It was shaky. Alec handed him an inhaler.

"I think we all reached a new level of friendship." I said before walking out. I realized we were still practically half naked.

"Wait... I'm forgetting something." I stopped us before we actually stepped out. I walked back to the shower and went to my jeans. I grabbed my lighter, and her picture. I should make a locket for this. Yeah, good idea. Anyways, I left my clothes since they always get cleaned and dropped off.

"Gay for the win." Alec cheered and kissed all our checks.

"Let's kick some ass." Adrian called.

"What they said." Hale pointed to them. I think we are making up catch phrases. I don't know but mine should be meme-like.

"I'm coming Harambe." I quickly said and the guys looked at me.

"Shut up Meme fag." Someone said and I looked back. There was Vic, he looked pulled together. Even after losing his brother. I wish I was like him, so strong. He was smiling so bright, it gave me hope.

"Hey guys... I got our van loaded up. Let's do this."