My Life in Pieces

Chapter 1: Crash

First of all, I would like to say that this is not a love story. It's simply my story. If you came here looking for romance, you should probably look somewhere else. You won't find it here.

My name is Josette. I know. It's a terrible name my parents saddled me with. I was supposed to be a boy and they had picked the name 'Joseph'. However, instead of a boy, they got me and decided to make Joseph into a girl name and... Bam. You get Josette. Thank you, mom and dad.

Anyways, I go by Seta (pronounced Zay-ta, just to be clear). I'm quite young, but old for my years... if that makes sense. Just to say I've seen a lot. I'm barely 21, but I've experienced so much.

I've been through good and bad. I've learned a lot in my few years. Because I'm rambling, I'll just start somewhere and go from there.

Let's see... I was never anyone at any time in my life. I was nobody in high school and that didn't change after. In fact, even though I felt pretty nonexistent in high school, I realized I actually was nonexistent after I graduated. I started working right out of high school instead of college. I had a love interest. I won't say I was in love. We dated in high school and continued our relationship after for a couple years.

I was pretty unsatisfied with my life, but things can in fact get worse. I bought and paid for my own car, a little blue junker I named Paul (because it was an ugly car and, let's face it, Paul is an ugly name. To anyone named Paul, I'm sorry, but it is.) Well, Paul was a lot of work. He burned through gas and ate up my money with all the parts he constantly needed.

I don't recall anything specific about the particular day it happened. I was just taking Paul to Benny, the mechanic I always went to for all Paul's problems. I was tired, I'll admit, and that probably made me a lot less alert.

I probably seemed like an asshole driver that day. Most of the time I am a terribly impatient driver and I do suffer from a mild case of drive-the-fucking-speed-limit-because-when-you-go-fifteen-under-it-makes-my-road-rage-flare-up, but on this day, it was just bad luck. Paul had been idling too low and liked to cut off sometimes at stops and when I reversed. I got up early because I had to work later and I had no idea how long it'd take.

I went straight from my bed to the car, with a quick stop by the closet so not to be seen in my pajamas. I drove the normal route most of the way, but for some reason decided to take a rarely used shortcut ( I usually used it when I was late to work). Now, honestly, it's only a shortcut if you drive twice the speed limit, which was in fact pretty dangerous because it's a really curvy road. Before you judge, this road hardly had traffic, so I didn't endanger anyone's life. However, on this day, I drove the speed limit because it was early and there was someone in front of me.

At the end of this winding road, it meets with the highway. Paul managed to stay idling while at the stop sign. Traffic was rather heavy that morning. I like my music way too loud, especially when I drive. It helps me concentrate and, by that, I mean it keeps me from getting bored and zoning out while I drive.

My music is loud. It's a bit chilly out, so I have the heat cranked up. I'm waiting for a gap between the cars. There are two lanes to cross. I spot a 4 second gap in the first lane and a 6 in the second. I only need three to get completely across. I release the brake and hit the gas to shoot across the gap. That's not what happens. 1... 2... 3... the car jolts forward finally... 4 I don't have enough speed. I'm not going to make it. 5. I see the car coming and for some reason, in that moment, I fully accepted that I would die. In those seconds before, I had held my breath in panic, but released it then. Collision.

The impact rattled my bones and threw me sideways and then forward as I was thrust back into the first lane and hit by a second car. It all happened so quickly and I was dazed. My face felt strange, almost numb. My vision was so blurry and my ears were ringing.