The Lego Aventure

WARNING: THIS BOOK CONTAINS VIOLENCE, PROFANITY AND RUDE STUFF THAT IS NOT APPROPRIATE FOR ANYONE UNDER THE AGE OF 12!!! Thank you!

Chapter 1: Attack

As the lights were switched of in Johnny's room, all hell broke lose! The lego figures, came to life all screaming with fright.

Ah, of course. You reader, you don't understand do you. See, this happens every night, when ever the owner of the lego set finds himself in the land of nod, the lego sets come to life. But in this particular set, there is a newcomer. A mysterious black figure, known as "The Lego Phantom"!

This figure is attacking people (or should I say figures) and killing them in the most brutal ways! What a nice surprise this will be for Johnny when he wakes up. But anyway back to the point. There was one particular couple who were oblivious to all this, because Xav and his wife Dana were having a Lego dance of springtime (making love if you don't understand that term).

They were obviously enjoying themselves, but then something cruel and unexpected happened. The Lego Phantom leapt through their window, like a cat pouncing on a mouse, interrupting their privacy. The Lego Phantom then summoned a knife (the Lego Phantom has special powers by the way) and slashed rhythmically at Dana's poor plastic face! "Nooooooo" Xav screamed "You bastard!".

The Lego Phantom then dropped the bloody knife, summoned a baseball bat, which he swung hard at Dana's ruined face. As her plastic neck snapped, her lego head went clean off, sailing through the room where it landed in the oven and sat there simmering happily.

Then he was of, The Lego Phantom flew out of the window and into the dark night sky, which turned grey with hate, and evil. And it was then, that Xav, an ordinary lego figure, swore an oath. An oath that he would hunt down, and kill this "Son-of-a-bitch" for the vengeance of his wife.

He knew what he had to do. Xav knew that he had to find a certain figure. One of the most famous figures in Legokind. He would use this figures mind powers to kill The Lego Phantom. This certain figure was, the Lego version of......

Stephen Hawking!

And that is where our story begins!

Chapter 2: The Adventure Begins

Xav vigorously packed his bags, packed his sunglasses, sun tan lotion, iPhone, hammock, sleeping bag, lilo, spare condoms just in case and his Teddy bear. As he was about to step out of his door, he hesitated and thought to himself "This is one small step for Lego, but one big leap for Lego City". And with that he was off!

As he walked through the gates of the city he turned and got one last look of all the figures waving at him, some were even blowing kisses at him (the men not the women, the lady's weren't interested in him at all)!

It took him three days to get to Lego Hogwarts, where he stayed the night. It wasn't a good sleep though, the owls kept flying in and Malfoy (that greasy shit head) kept putting snakes under his bed!

The next day he visited an inn where the bar tender provided him with food and drink. He enjoyed them very much and had just lent back in his seat when he was charged £26.13. And then it struck him! He had forgot to bring money! With that he shot up and trotted out of the door. And ever since then, Xav has been on the run from The Lego Brick Inn.

Chapter 3: The Adventure Continues

The adventure continued.

Chapter 4: Meeting A Hobbit

After several days of travelling, Xav came across a Lego Hobbit Hole belonging to a Lego Hobbit called Bilbo.

They introduced each other kindly, then Xav asked if he could stay the night at this hole. Bilbo replied "Of course" and welcomed Xav in. He was then chucked out again because he hadn't taken his "Muddy" Lego shoes off!