The tale of being famous ON HOLD (Jamie Campbell Bower)

Chapter 5

It was the day before the premiere. And I was fucking nervous. If someone says he doesn't get stage fright anymore he's a lyar. You're not an actor if you're not sitting behind the curtain and jiggling while you see the theatre getting filled with people.

Thank God I knew that all the nervousness would be gone when I stood on the stage and the lights shone into my eyes.

But for now, I had to be satisfied with hyperventilating while Gus and me practiced our text a last few times.

"Gus, I don't think I can do this." I whined. "I'm going to forget everything and make a complete fool of myself! What am I gonna do?!" I didn't mean it like that but you just say that kind of stuff before an important premiere. You just panic because of the pressure. But still... I wouldn't want to trade my job for anything else because the adrenaline kicks you're getting when you're playing a play for the first time or the feeling you get when everyone applaudes and you get standing ovations... Holy crap! That's the best you've ever felt in your entire life, honestly.

"Of course you can, Scar." said Gus and looked deep into my eyes. "You're a great actress."

"Really?"

"The best I've ever known." he smiled and I hugged him, feeling a lot better now.

"Thanks. That's just what I needed."

"OKAY GUYS!!! Back to scene 4!!! We'll do it all over again!!! Scarlet, it's your "boyfriend", I want to see more emotion. Just try kneeling down next to him again." Scott interrupted us and I rushed behind the left curtain on the side.

This was hell. We had played the scene for the fifth time but Scott yet still found something that wasn't quite right.

After rehearsal Emily, Jam, Aaron, Max, me and Gus went to Benny's to celebrate the "official" start of our play.

"I'm so fucking nervous." Em said between two huge bites of chocolate cake. "Like, honestly, I'm gonna mess up my text so bad."

"What shall I say? I've got this huge monologue in the middle? You know that one with the cigarette? Yeah."

I guess Gus was the only one who was relatively calm.

Max and Aaron tried to hide it but they really were only an inch away from collapsing into their bagles.

"How about a little movie night so we can relax a little before shit goes down?" Jamila suggested.

"I'm in." me and Emily said at the same time.

"Ah, sorry but I prefer crying into my sheets while I'm home alone." said Aaron ironically.

"I'd really like to but honestly, I have to get up really early and you know what happens when I don't get enough sleep. Maybe another time."

Yes, we all knew what happened when Max didn't get enough sleep. First, he then looked like a bunny on weed and second, his concentration was so bad that he kind of just hobbled around like some pudding and wasn't able to pay ANY kind of attention.

"Yeah well, apropos de... I've got to go now. I'm meeting up with Kev in a few minutes." Kevin was her boyfriend. They had been together for about two years now and he was a really nice guy but we didn't get to meet him very often because he travelled a lot and when he was here in London he wanted to spend all of his free time with Em and just Em. Understandable.

"Oh, you two have fun." Jam grinned and we all hugged Emily goodbye. A few seconds later Max said he had to go, too, and after about three minutes there were only Jamila, Gus and me left.

"What do you think of late tea at my flat?" Gus asked.

***

I sat in Cheyennes chair and was a hop away from completely freaking out. She just laughed at me, what didn't make the situation any better. "C'mon, cherie! Se play will be great. Because you and dear Gus are in it. You're boz great and you know sat!" She said while spraying a last bit of hair spray on my head. I coughed.