So Sorry, Lover (Oliver Sykes X Reader)

Cemetery Drive

I rubbed my eyes as they adjusted to my dim, moonlit room. I flipped over on my side, cringing as the pain of my slit wrists visited me. I rose them up to see them in better light. They were starting to scab over and I picked at them. One started to bleed again and I rolled my eyes. I would just cover it up with a hoodie tomorrow. This night seemed to be sweltering and overwhelming, and I decided to tear the blankets off my bed. I laid onto my back and stared at the ceiling. Tomorrow, I would have to go back to school. And the bullies. And the same routine that somehow managed to find me in the summer. Hence, the cuts on my wrist. "Why do you dress like that? Think it makes you looks good? Huh? Oh, I get it. You're too dumb to answer. Stupid... ugly... fat...bitch." The words replayed in my head and the world around me started to blur. I felt one hot tear trickle down my face so so slowly. I swept it off my face and quickly sat up. I fumbled around for my phone and my earbuds and laid back down. After searching, I found the song I wanted: "Cemetery Drive" by one of your favorite bands, My Chemical Romance.

This night, walk the dead

In a solitary style

And crash the cemetery gates.

In the dress your husband hates

Way down, mark the grave

Where the search lights find us

Drinking by the mausoleum door

And they found you on the bathroom floor

I miss you, I miss you so far

And the collision of your kiss that made it so hard

Back home, off the run

Singing songs that make you slit your wrists

It isn't that much fun, staring down a loaded gun

So I won't stop dying, won't stop lying (are you there at all?)

If you want I'll keep on crying (do you care at all?)

Did you get what you deserve? (are you there at all?)

Is this what you always want me for?

I miss you, I miss you so far

And the collision of your kiss that made it so hard

Way down, way down

Way down, way down

Way down, way down

Way down, way down

I miss you, I miss you so far

And the collision of your kiss that made it so hard

When will I miss you, when will I miss you so far

And the collision of your kiss that made it so hard

Made it so hard

Way down, way down

Way down, way down

Way down, way down

Way down, way down

Way down...

You sighed and fell way down into a slumber.

~~~

You startled yourself awake at the unusual sound of your alarm, which had been idle all summer. You quickly brushed the thing you called hair and decided to leave it plain today. You shuffled through your wardrobe looking for something, anything that would make you look okay. You found a pair of black leggings and pulled a pair of faded black shorts over them. Somewhere in the depths of your closet was a t-shirt that said "DEATH" and was part of a set that said "Death Spells". And lastly, you slipped on a pair of black vans and a "Three Cheers" pullover. You were something of an MCR fanatic. Stumbling down the stairs, you ran into the kitchen, grabbed a granola bar and ran out of the house. It was just you and your mom these days after your father died in Afghanistan. You hardly talked to your mom anymore. She sunk into some hole of depression and was now selectively mute. But she didn't get kicked. Or yelled at. Or called names... So many names. You shook your head as you kept your head down walking to school. Maybe today- this year, even- would be different. You laughed at the thought and kept walking.