LOVE MIRAGE

Book 1- life & society

The memories never faded, I could recite everything momma taught me. Things were different here, the days were dull and bland, the Lilly's went to hide, The nature rested, one could tell it was coming to an end well even though there wasn't a beginning. As a little girl growing up in a desolated family things weren't easy. Each morning before the scolding sun would come out I would fetch water by the near by stream, feed the animals in the barn and wash the dishes. Daddy never had a stable job always from one to the other trying his best to meet the needs of the family, momma worked at The ackee factory down on stanton road, I had to stay home and watched Peter my little brother and keep the stray goats away from our farm. I've always wanted to go to school, being deprived of a chance to be educated but I knew I had no other choice, who knew? I could become a police, writer, account or maybe a doctor but my dream was actually to become a teacher, to educate others ,I've always had The passion to help those in need despite my current state. I was only 16 but I was aware of many things, momma taught me how to be courteous,wash cook , clean and be a lady, well she was just preparing me for my stereotypical image of being passive in society rather than being assertive.The most important thing that momma never taught me was how to love, that was the missing key feature, nobody knew how to love, love was lost.If you dare to utter such word out your mouth everyone would trample down on you like a old wall tumbling down but as i grew older i understand that it is no that thy fear love but that they dont know how to love.

Merrisa the only child for the Hills was a spoilt little brat who surprisingly was the best friend of Marcy. she was the total opposite of her, how could two different individuals dare to combine a friendship? it was when Marcy just moved to here in the early 19th century that she had became acquainted with Merrisa, they met at the near by shop within there community where Marcy was purchasing a tin of mackerel and a bag of rice and didn't have sufficient funds to get them and merrisa out of no where paid the additional balance and said " Let me get that for ya okay" and Marcy there stuttering accepted the offer in a ashamed manner and responded in a low voice " thanks nice girl" . From ever since they were best of friends. Captivated by the lifesyle of Merrisa who's parents were wealthy and lived in a meticulous house on clifton street amongst the other well established individuals gave her a sense of motivation that uplifted her in reaching her goals and being successful hopefully someday.

momma had a bad leg that had been haunting her for years, she was in a accident in her early teen years. She told us the story whenever she realized that we lost hope.She would say in her jamaican accent " marcy and peter come sit right yaso" and would carefully lift her right leg on the stool and went on to say " if yo nuh determine ina life you'll get no where! when i was about your age marcy i got this bad leg you see her , yes ! years now i have this leg and still carrying on why? because i wanted the best for my kids at that time i was pregnant with you mercy" and she went on lamenting while the air stood still and all I could think of is how to improve my situation. While looking around the room tears drifted from my eyes slowly making its way down my chest, from that moment on wards i knew i had to make a difference.

Old Man Haggy lived outside town, he displayed similar traits like me, we had so much in common for two different sexes, the others would consider us aliens for a man and woman sharing similar interest as they say it shows a sense love.

I would always go see him on a thursday when momma would come home early and sometimes carry him dinner, his wife died years back ago when one of her lovers caught her in the act with another man, Old man Haggy was devastated even this day he lives in denial that his wife was capable of doing such a felony act.

For a man his age he,s very active, I believe thats his way of blocking his mind from remembering the past, he works in his farm and goes to the market and sell his products. He was a motivational figure to me, he always implored to me to do well on whatever i set my mind on and that the impossible is always possible.

He once tried sending me to school but unsuccessful in fulfilling such as girls were denied entry into school , momma once said " the only education u gonna get is that here at home". That made me question society and realized that we needed a change in the system so that females can be recognized. I had a plan for them all, just give me a few years to come! dont worry my sisters i shouted.

Old man Haggy had a premonition about Marcy he feared that she would end up in a similar love situation that he was in years ago, he tried to warn her but she was reluctant and determine to seek true love in this fabricated society.

Andre after school would go by Marcy and teach her what he had learned at school , he knew she had a passion for education, she was fascinated by the big words that they would learn and the figures, how to do math, she was enlighten and surprisingly everyday after practicing she got better and was more fluent than Andre and would sometimes help him with math he wondered how such was possible.