Joke's On Us

Ivy:Harley pov

Batman stood in the doorway of my room. "Uh Mr. J, we've got company." Batman stood there and didn't say a word.

"Company what are you talking about?" Joker came up next to me and stopped. "Batsy, what a pleasant surprise."

"I'm gonna need you to come with me." Batman said and held up handcuffs.

"That's no fun so I choose hmm no." Joker and I laughed.

"You broke into Arkham Asylum and terrorized the doctors and patients. You're under arrest. Both of you."

"Hey now!" I chimed in. "We didn't break in, we pressed the little button and they let us in and we were just playing a game."

"Can't you take a joke Bats?" Joker added.

"You can come with me willingly or choose the hard way."

I yawned. "Boys!" I called and Joker's gang of henchman appeared. When the first shot was fired Joker grabbed me by my arm and ran with me. I spotted my jacket on the kitchen counter so I took it as we ran. We got to the car. "We can't leave them!"

"Who?" Joker asked obviously.

"The guys."

"We don't have time for this. I'll get you a dog."

"I like wild animals."

"I'll get you a hyena then, can we go?"

"Fine fine whatever." I said and Joker pulled out of the parking garage so fast the car screeched. I held onto my seat as he sped through the streets of New York. I saw in the rear view mirror a black fancy car similar to ours except the coloring. We had purple. I saw it had a bat shape on the license plate. "Batsy Batsy Batsy." I said laughing and Joker went faster.

"Batter up, Bats."Joker said and pressed a button. I looked behind us and a huge bat attached to the car attacked Batman's car. I laughed so hard. Batter up and he was a bat dude. The bat went back in and Batman was on top of the car.

"Stupid Bat!" I yelled and leaned out the window shooting at him. I got one of his arms and he doubled back enough that we drove away leaving the bat in the dust.

"Good job Harley!"

"It was a pretty good shot under the circumstances don't ya think?"

"You should've shot his head." I wacked Joker with the back of my hand and he almost hit another car. "I was kidding Harl."

••••••••••

We made it all the way to Times Square. Joker was driving somewhat normally now. "Where are we going?" Joker asked.

"You're the driver!"

"Yes but I've barely been in this part of the city."

"Ivy! She lives close by. Turn here and then the next left." I said. I had forgotten. I wasn't sure if she would shelter us but it was worth a shot. She sure wasn't buddy buddy with Batman.

•••••••

"Well isn't this a surprise?" Ivy stood at the door of her hotel room. Lucky for Joker and me she hadn't moved.

"We need to stay here a few days." I said. "Batman is looking for us and we need time and a safe place to plan."

"What she said." Joker muttered.

"You've got one week." I thanked Ivy as she stepped aside letting us in. "I have the joined room lucky you in case someone comes looking for me but you can use it, just keep it down when you're going down alright?" I laughed and Joker frowned. Joker followed me into the other room. Ivy gave us a key, she only had one and let us be.

"Puddin, I'm worried about the boys." Joker turned to me.

"So I'm not good enough for you? Huh?"

I shook my head.

"Am I enough for you Harley?!"

"Yessir." I said and Joker patted my head. It was so demeaning so I pulled his head back by his hair. "I'm not a dog!"

"Yessm" He said and I let him go. We both stared at each other for a minute and then laughed. I kissed him. "We need to get to work." Joker said pulling away and I crossed my arms. "I know. I'll give you lots of attention once the plan is at least constructed." I turned away and sat on the bed. "Harley baby, you know we have to start right away."

"I know I just wanted a little kiss." He smiled and walked over in front of me. He kissed me and tangled his fingers in my hair. I hugged his waist and he pushed me back on the bed. The door opened and Joker slowly sat up.

"Jeez already!? I figured y'all would last at least an hour. I'm ordering food what do ya love birds want?"

"Pizza!" I said and sat up bumping heads with Joker. "Puddin and I love pizza."

"You got it girl." Ivy winked and closed the door.

"How'd you know I love pizza? I never told you that." Joker asked while massaging my scalp.

"You get extra happy when we get pizza and you like making Jokes about the delivery guy and the stuff written on the box."

"Harley, you're perfect."

"Right!?" I said agreeing. He laughed and gave me one more kiss before grabbing paper and a pencil and sitting at the desk next to the bed.

"I'm gonna be working a while. Daddy needs alone time."

I rolled my eyes and left to see Ivy.