Nothing Left To Lose

prologue

Sometimes life throws unexpected catastrophic disasters on your face which leave you scarred internally and externally, something similar happened with me.

Just when I thought that nothing could get better everything took a turn for the worst.

My life was pretty fucking perfect until exactly a month and two days ago. Have you heard that (I bet you’ve never heard that because I just made it up) until you lose it you never understand the significance of the simple things that come in life uninvited, and take them for granted.

I didn’t understand either; I too took the simplest yet most important thing in life for granted, and when life came with a stick in hand hoping for some fun with me I could do nothing but wipe my tears.

It all began when my brother and sister-in-law went to tour France and Italy for a week each. To make up for not being there during delivery of little Claire, their daughter, I offered to take care of her during the two weeks.

I felt tears prickling my eyelids when I remembered that day.

I had just put Claire to sleep when my brother called me.

“Hwelllwo” I said my mouth half full of yoghurt.

“Um, hello am I speaking to Sabrina Peige?” Wow, someone was being civil.

“Why, yes you are victor peige, enlighten me what bought about those kind words from  the devils mouth?” I asked with a chuckle after swallowing the yogurt and taking another spoonful.

“Ms. Peige this is Jeremy Anderson the chief of police of Paris, and I gather that you are the sister of Mr. Piege.” That got my attention alright.

“Is Victor alright sir?” I said panic sitting inside me.

“It’s best if it is explained by someone who understands it the best.” I felt the phone being passed around and furrowed my eyebrows trying to comprehend why my brother’s phone was with a police chief. I felt the line being picked again

“Hello”

“What has happened to my brother?”

“Umm my name is…”

“Dude I don’t care about your name, what I do care about is that why a random police chief is calling me on a Sunday evening from my brother’s phone”

“ Fine have it your way I thought I could bring it down gently but as you wish, just a few hours ago I arrived at my holiday home here in Paris, and while taking a stroll through the woods nearby I saw the body of your brother and a girl who I am assuming to be your sister in law……”

I felt the spoon full of yogurt fall on the as I processed what the strange man on phone was saying, body?

What did he mean by that?

I took deep breaths in order to calm myself and stop the panic from rising.

“………….so I called the police and let them handle the matter” he finished.

“so are…are they …………dead?” I flinched while saying it.

There was silence on the other side which answer enough for me.

And so the tears fell……………..

I tried furiously to blink away the tears with the memory but one treacherous tear made its journey.

After the formalities were complete and the police got everything they could use as evidence the bodies were shipped back to the USA.

The funeral was a blur of black and handling Claire.

What now you ask.

Well now I’m moving to England, because the authorities wanted to keep an eye on how I am handling Claire and if I’m good enough to take care of Claire, since my brother and sister-in-law were citizens of England, if I get the clean chit I’m free to take Claire back to USA else Claire would be given for foster care.

The ring of the phone bought me back to the present.

I felt a smile ease on my lips as I saw that it was Andrew who was calling.

My fiancé.

Through it all Andrew had been my backbone, never letting go of me, arranging the funeral, consoling me and at times- crying with me.

“Andrew” I whispered on the phone.

“Hey Ser, could you spare a sec?”

“Of course, what is it?” I said smiling.

“Ser, we need to talk………”