There were two things that Keith disliked the most about college:
1. His roommate's taste in music
2. Sanchez
Aka. Keith and Lance become texting buddies thinking they have never met but they do in fact know each other and dislike each other w...
Today was not one of Lance's best days. In fact, it could not even be considered a good day, or a day at all. Lance woke up in the middle of the night to a bloody nose and a migraine of Samson's strength. Using the hem of his shirt to control the bleeding, the thin man climbed off the top bunk, grabbing his phone from its place charging at the corner of the cluttered desk before hiding away in the bathroom.
As soon as he turned on the lights, he could see the terrifying reflection that stared back at him. Blood covered his entire upper lip and part of the cheek he had been resting on while asleep, not to mention the giant bloodstain on his shirt he would now need to wash off.
Unlocking his phone in a quick V pattern, Lance opened the GroupMe app, sending a stereotypical mirror selfie to the members of the planetarium club
[2:41 am]
Lance Ice Baby has sent a photo
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9999CP Pidgey: did you turn into a zombie without telling us?
Coranic: HOLY QUIZNACK! tHAT'S a lot of blood
Alluring: Lance you idiot
Alluring: are you okay?
Lance Ice Baby: im fine babe, u should c the other guy tho
official dad: LANCE
Lance Ice Baby: im ok
Lance Ice Baby: its just a nosebleed
9999CP Pidgey: did you dream of Mister Mullet™ to get such a blood bath??
Alluring likes this message
Lance Ice Baby: OOOOH HELL NAH
Lance Ice Baby: I AINT DREMING BOUT THAT LIL SHIT
9999CP Pidgey: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Alluring: why did i bother waking up
Alluring: screw you, boys
Alluring: im going to bed
Lance Ice Baby: sweet drems princess~~~
official dad: I'm gonna check out too
Choranic: same here
Choranic: there is much to do in the mor
9999CP Pidgey: mor?
Lance Ice Baby: mor.
Choranic: oh shut it
Lance put his phone down on the counter, staring at his bloodied reflection. He agreed that in fact he did resemble a zombie somewhat. Oddly proud of that fact, Lance took a couple more light-headed selfies before wiping off the blood with a wet towel. After stripping himself of the stained shirt, he threw it in the sink, allowing the water to run through and soak the fabric. Lance opened the bathroom door, grabbing his phone on the way out, when a terrified Hunk threw himself at Lance, toppling the both unto the cold tiled floor.
"What the heckie, bro!?" Lance groaned, his body in shock from the sudden weight on top of him. "Warn me next time, will ya? You can hold it a little longer."
"Lance!" Hunk immediately sat up. "Oh thank goodness you're alright. I saw the blood and- Well I thought you had gotten killed or something and then I heard the phone camera- What if the killer was taking selfies with your corpse in the bathroom!? What would I tell your parents!?" The big man stopped his rambling when Lance placed a hand on his shoulder.
"Hunk... callate," he stated simply before slipping out from under his roommate and standing up. "Anyway, if a killer were to sneak into our dorm room, he would probably go after you first. You're bottom bunk."
Hunk narrowed his eyes. "Wow," he sniffed. "That just made me feel so much better. Thanks, Lance. If a murderer does come in I'll make sure he gets to you first."
"Me vale. I'll kick their asses into the sun." Lance made a dramatic punching motion, keeping the pose for a couple of moments longer than needed.
"Right," Hunk deadpanned. "You go do that. I'm going back to bed." The man left Lance posing alone in the yellow bathroom light.
The thinner roommate scoffed, relaxing back into a more comfortable position. He soon realized that he was still light-headed from the massive loss of blood. With nothing better to do, Lance headed to their small kitchenette. Once he opened the mini-fridge, he realized that there was nothing there except a box of month-old take out leftovers.
It was way too late, or early for that matter, to go to the cafeteria and get some actual food, so Lance decided to risk it and eat the stale contents of the styrofoam container.
"If it looks and smells edible, its probably safe to eat," Lance muttered to himself as he took out the box and shut the refrigerator door.
